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She squirmed again, her belly pressing against his cock, making it strain even more to be free. “I don’t know.” There was a note of sulkiness in her voice. “Fine, I guess.”
Without hesitation, Rafe brought his hand cracking down against her ass, five times on each cheek. She was gasping by the time his hand returned to her thigh.
“Want to try that one again? Or would you rather move on or use your safeword?” If she really had been in a full-time power exchange scenario, she’d need frequent reminding that she always had a choice. “It’s up to you.”
She’d tensed up during her punishment, but slowly relaxed against the sofa cushions. “At first, I thought he was perfect,” she admitted. “He understood things about me I didn’t even understand about myself. He had a bit of a temper, but Ilikedthe pain, so I didn’t consider it a problem. And after, he always bought me the most amazing things. Designer clothes, nice jewelry, expensive makeup, perfume. That sort of stuff.”
“Did he ever go too far?”
She was quiet for several seconds—which was all the answer he needed, really.
“What happened?”
“He did something to piss me off. Went on a business trip without telling me, I think.” Her voice was quieter than it had been. “He told me to be waiting at his place when he got back, but I was mad, so I went out with some friends instead. He was at my apartment when I got home.”
He definitely knew where this was going. “Did he hit you?”
“Yes.” She breathed the word.
“A lot?”
That time, all she could do was nod.
Rafe closed his eyes, taking several calming breaths before asking, “What did he buy you to make up for that?”
“An Audi.” She sounded ashamed to admit it.
More like she was ashamed to admit it worked.
“It’s not your fault,” Rafe told her, squeezing her thigh, feeling the thin lines against his skin. “You were practically still a kid. He knew exactly how to manipulate you.” And fuck it all, this was the guybeforeMicah.
“That’s no excuse.” Fuck, she was crying. He hated making women cry by mistake. It only brought him pleasure when it was intentional. “My friends told me to sell the car and leave his ass. And they were the same age as me.”
“It’s always easier to make a good judgment call when you’re not in the situation yourself.” He gave her leg a couple of awkward pats, wishing he knew how to soothe her properly. “And your dynamic with Brian already involved physical pain—something most of your friends probably also didn’t understand. No wonder the lines got blurred.”
Gathering some of her moisture on his thumb, he started rubbing harder circles against her clit, pumping his first two fingers in and out of her pussy at the same time. Nell must’ve figured out he stopped whenever she got greedy, because she stayed perfectly still. The only evidence he affected her at all came from her heavy breathing. She whimpered when he pulled away that time.
“What made you finally leave Brian?”
She drew in a long, shaky breath. “Micah.”
Here we go,Rafe thought, not looking forward to this part of the story at all. “Where did you two meet?”
“An audition for a TV show pilot.”
His brows shot upward. “You were an actress?”
“I was trying to be. That’s why I went to college in L.A. I was a theater major.”
She definitely hadn’t put any of that info in her application. No way would he have forgotten a detail like that. “Did you get the part?”
Nell shook her head, and there was genuine remorse in her voice when she said, “The only parts I ever got were in theater productions at school. Micah started mentoring me after we met, giving me all sorts of advice I’m pretty sure now was bullshit. But he’d gotten a bunch of minor roles on TV shows, and even played a coffee shop owner with several lines in a Hallmark movie, so I figured he had to know what he was talking about. Besides, it’s not like we were going for the same parts, so why would he want to sabotage me? And the sex was so fucking goodat first...” She let out a long, frustrated sigh. “My auditions were all such big disasters, it wasn’t even hard for Micah to convince me to give up.”
Rage coursed through him with all the speed and fury of a wildfire. “That motherfucker manipulated you. He isolated you and fucked with your self-esteem so you’d do anything to keep his attention on you. That’s what abusers do, the piece of shit.”
Twisting around, Nell looked up at him, their gazes meeting. He almost looked away, not wanting to scare her, but the storm in his eyes didn’t seem to frighten her at all. Perhaps because it wasn’t directed at her. If anything, she looked calmer than she had since she walked into the room.
She settled back down over his thighs with a contented sigh. “It’s okay. I know now I never would’ve made it in Hollywood anyway. I don’t think I have the right temperament. You have to be willing to do anything to make it, to put yourself before everyone else, and I never could’ve done that.” She shrugged. “Now I just have to figure out what the new dream should be. I don’t want to be a bartender forever, but at least it got me on my feet again.”
