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“That’s why I’m confused,” she said, sitting, straddling his lap. “I like our honesty and you said trust is your religion. I want to honor that.” She tilted her head to the other side. “But I’m new to this secret-agent thing. I don’t know all the rules. He told me not to tell anyone about him, so I want to respect his confidence… At the same time, I want you to know everything. I didn’t tell him about the blood thing, and I told you. He doesn’t know about the Scepter, and you do…”
“You want to tell me about him because you want us to have complete trust.” She nodded and was elated to see his smile, even if she didn’t understand it. “Baby, trust doesn’t have to be about confessing every detail. When I go out on missions, I’m aware there are times I don’t know everything. That others in the ranks above know more than I do and those below know less. I trust that I know what I need to. I trust the people sending me into battle and those at my side to give me the information I need to keep my unit safe and complete my mission.Trust is going to war sure that those with you will give as much as you, fight as hard as you.” He pushed her hair back over her shoulders, uncovering her breasts. “You don’t have to tell me everything. I trust your love. I trust your heart. I trust that you would never endanger me. Just as I want you to trust that, if you want to, you can tell me anything and always be sure it will never go any further or be used against you. This unit…” He took hold of her wrists to put her hands on his chest, which he then covered with his own. “Is your shelter. Don’t worry that you’ll lose it. Don’t worry it could be taken away. I will always be your somewhere safe, even if I don’t know everything, understand?”
Her hands ascended until the tips of her fingers met his jaw. “I would die before I’d ever hurt you,” she said, setting her fierce eyes on his, trying to convey determination. “You are what I fight for now. I will do whatever it takes to give you your happiness.”
“That, baby,” he said, sinking his fingers into her hair. “That’s trust.”
A few seconds passed. They existed together. Appreciating each other. Appreciating proximity.
“We weren’t supposed to find this, to find love. Our lives weren’t meant to join,” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck to pull herself against him. “But I’m so happy that they did. Thank you for hating me enough to want me dead.”
Wearing a scowl, he tried to take her arms from around him. “Babe…”
She clung on tighter. “If you’d come to me as you, either I wouldn’t have believed a word you said or I’d have been too intimidated to trust you.”
He relaxed and after gazing into her eyes for a while, breathed out a smile. Taking her by surprise, he flipped her onto her back. “You mean you’re not intimidated by me?” he asked, stroking her nose with his before kissing the tip. “And I worked so hard on that.”
“My eyes are your downfall,” she murmured, thinking about what Styx said about Harry and her mom’s eyes. “When you look at me you… I don’t know what it is.”
“You bewitch me,” he said, brushing his lips across hers. “I’d do anything those eyes asked. I can read you, everything you’re feeling, it just flows from your baby blues.”
Lying there beneath him, she lost herself in the moment. With his weight cocooning her, shielding her, there was no way she could ever be safer. Time lost all meaning.
Her father was enchanted by her mother’s eyes. Were they like this? Completely obsessed, over the top captivated and enthralled. Loving Daire gave her a whole new perspective on her parents’ relationship. She’d judged her father for abandoning them, for not fighting harder. But would Daire do anything less for her? For their child, if they ever found themselves in the same situation.
She couldn’t even remember the last time they used protection and wouldn’t go back to that. The implant was meant to save them from unexpected pregnancies, but nothing was guaranteed.
Knowing Olympus, she could understand why her father’s first reaction to the pregnancy was that it shouldn’t go ahead. But she could understand why her mother didn’t tell him, if she’d even had a way to get in touch with him.
“I would never get rid of your baby,” she said, her mouth finishing a thought without explaining where it came from first.
Their ease dissipated as his brow lowered. “We’re pregnant?”
“No,” she said, grabbing for him when he started to retreat. “No, but I’m saying…” She breathed until he focused on her again. “I was thinking about my mom and Harry, can you imagine what they went through? If they felt anything like this, anything like us…” A tear trickled from the corner of her eye. Daire shifted his forearm on the bed to brush it away. “She must have been so scared.”
“That will never be us,” he said, absolutely sure as he clamped his arms tighter to gather her closer, offering more security. “I would never walk away from my family.”
Because his viewpoint came from the other side. He’d been the one left behind at Olympus while Harry went to be with the woman he loved.
“Even to keep me safe?” she said, hoping he’d see Harry’s perspective. It would do so much for his own dignity to know he hadn’t driven Harry away or been inadequate, unable to keep him at Olympus. “To keep our child safe?”
“Baby, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to keep you safe. But Carrie wasn’t safe out there. Neither of you were. Do you know how many times Zeus almost caught up with you? You moved so much because Olympus is that good and Zeus that vindictive. Would you want our child to be raised the way you were?”
Never stopping. Always moving. Lost. Untethered. Roaming.
“Would you want them to be raised like you were?” she asked.
Each of them knew the answer to the other’s question. For a score of seconds, it seemed like he wanted to come up with an answer, he didn’t. Couldn’t. After accepting that, he moved away to lie on his own side.
In silence, they lay there, facing the truth. For a minute there, she’d wanted to believe there was a chance for them. The day had been so good… After Leonard was cold cocked anyway.
But it would never be. Daire belonged to Olympus and that meant he could never belong to anyone else.
Her hand slid to her side on the mattress, accidently brushing against his. Intending to give him his space, she moved it away. Both of them needed to be smarter and stricter. They weren’t doing each other any favors by playing in bliss like it ever had any chance of being real.
The edge of his little finger touched hers. After the whisper of contact, he lingered for a beat before curling his over hers, waiting for hers to respond. Twisting her hand toward his, she curved her finger around his, each responding until they were curled together tight.
The only future she could assure was his. They’d get to Styx, retrieve the keys, and then Daire would have the power to make his Olympus everything that it should be.
