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Am I really going to take my panties off?
I debate about it as I wash my hand. I’ve come this far. There’s no backing out now. So, once again hiking up my skirt, I take off my black lace panties. With all the anxiety about putting in the plug, it feels like a passing moment as my muscles loosen and the plug slides in deeper.
I feel it deep at the back of me. I don’t want to sit down anywhere, but then standing for too long may be a problem too.
I suck in a breath and head to the door. My ass feels as if it’s on fire. I move my hips back and forth, thinking maybe I can get it out.
This was a bad idea.
A very silly one.
“What’s wrong, Leticia? You look beautiful, but uncomfortable.”
“It hurts. It hurts so bad.”
“Let me take it out,” he says. “I know that I’ve been odd again. It’s just with the call and everything. Come here.”
“No!”
If I take it out, then it will all be over. He said to give it a try, and the way he rushed to my aid and his eyes widened, I know Diego wouldn’t want to hurt me.
I rush to the bathroom. I don’t want him to see me like this. Once inside, I bend down again and apply gentle pressure to the plug with my hand. It’s as if every motion sends a sting, but the more I take it out and then reinsert it, the more the stinging sensation becomes a natural one.
Once done and feeling more comfortable, I wash my hands thoroughly and then splash cold water on my face.
“You can take it out. This was a bad idea!” Diego shouts through the door. I ignore him as I move toward the door, and then I pause. He wants me to stop. He expects me to give up.
The old Leticia would have done just that, but he doesn’t know he’s made me feel like a woman in the space of a week. I’ve come in ways I didn’t even think were possible until he received that phone call and everything’s come to a grinding halt, though he said that he can be like this. He’s warned me, so I know what I’m in for and I’m not about to give up on him.
“I’m ready,” I say as I smile at him.
He shakes his head. “You don’t have to do this. It was a stupid, selfish idea.”
I hand him my panties and say, “But it was your idea. Now are you going to finally take me out of this suite, or am I going to have to beg?”
He doesn’t say another word as I take his elbow and he leads me out of the suite. Tonight is about getting used to him enjoying my body. I crave two things right now. I want him to enjoy me, and I love the idea of being enjoyed by him.
Some part of me wonders if we could just stay in Japan forever, because it feels like a fairy tale. I worry that going back home will change everything and make everything which has happened here feel as if it were just a dream.
15
Diego
I'm in a charcoal-gray suit, while she's in a gold kimono. I know she’s uncomfortable with the plug because when she walks, it is as if her feet are nearly stuck together. She’s scared to part them in case it falls out, but it doesn’t work that way.
What started as a game for us both to enjoy, I’m slowly regretting. I take her hand as we walk to the elevator. The excitement of leaving the suite seems to take over her as she beams with a smile. As we enter the elevator, she opens her mouth to ask the question I know is buzzing in her head.
“So, is there a clue as to where we are going?”
I pause as I take in her appearance. Her eyes are wide, and as if we’ve forgotten who we really are or what we’re doing in Japan.
There’s this fighter spirit in Leticia, and I completely misjudge her limits every time. I feel like a child with her, curious about how far she will go before she gives up. She’s so determined to learn, and part of me wonders if I should show her all of me. If she can really handle it.
The family have me in a box, one I can’t get out of whenever it comes to showing anyone the real me. Facing Papá isn’t easyfor me; it never has been, and that will never change. I turn into a shell of a boy. And when I go back home, I’ll have to talk to him and Jorge. The two people I despise most in the world. The problem is that if I tell that to Leticia, she will never understand. She’ll pity me, and no one should feel sorry for me. I won’t allow it.
“What are you thinking about?” Leticia asks as she looks up at me with expressive eyes.
“How beautiful you look tonight.Hermosa1.”
