AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Then my Grace reappears. She looks as though she has taken a moment to shore herself up, to conceal her emotions inside of herself. It makes my heartspace drop, and apologies line up on my tongue that I am unsure if she will understand. I would give them to her anyway, but before I can speak a single word, my Grace holds out a clenched fist towards me, unfurls her fingers to reveal the geberren root she holds.
CHAPTER FIVE
Grace
Knowing what I do of raskarrans and their attitude to nudity, I’m almost certain getting clean is all Calran had in mind when he brought me into this cave. I’ve seen plenty of naked raskarrans since arriving in the village - enough that I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did to a bare chest.
But with Calran everything feels automatically more charged, and sometimes that’s a good feeling - a heat settling low in my belly that makes me feel warm and good and like being brave. Sometimes, though, my instincts shut my mind off before I have the chance to remind myself that this is Calran and I’m safe with him. That getting naked doesn’t automatically mean sex will follow.
My hand trembles as I hold out the geberren root I collected earlier to him - the only signal I can think of to show that I dowant to get clean. That I want to push myself to get clean with him.
It’s as good a way as any to get used to his naked body, just as I’ve done with everyone else.
Calran’s hand closes over the top of mine, the other coming to cup my hand from underneath. Encased in his warmth and strength, the trembling in my hand finally starts to subside. His expression as he looks at me is full of sorrow and apology. I’m grateful for his empathy, how quickly he understood where my reaction came from.
That there’s no indication at all that he took it personally.
He releases my hands, then heads to the edge of the water, dropping down to sit on the floor. He rolls up his trousers until they’re above his knees, putting his feet in the water. He looks at me, gesturing to the space between his legs. My heart pounds, and I think it’s only half panic. I try to listen to the other half - the part of me that tingles with something that might be anticipation.
I set the geberren root down beside him, then reach for the ties on my trousers. My hands are trembling again, and I fumble the knot a couple of times before finally getting it undone, lowering my trousers to the floor and stepping out of them. My panties I leave in place, raising my hands to the hem of my top. Discomfort rises in me, but I push it down, try to work through it. Lift the top over my head.
I hear Calran’s intake of breath while the fabric is still over my head, blocking my view. I take my time setting the top down on the floor with my trousers, folding it neatly to buy myself a moment to gather my courage, then turn to him, meeting his gaze.
Heat, liquid and golden pouring out of his eyes and into me. My skin prickles all over, blood rushing to my cheeks, my chest, a low, throbbing pulse starting up in that place between mythighs. I don’t know how a look can make me feel so much, but it does, and I let all those feelings settle, really experience them for a moment. Feel the racing of my heart in my chest and the way my breath catches in my lungs. So similar to fear. It makes it harder to figure out where the fear ends and the anticipation begins, but the more I listen, the more I sit with the feelings, the more I realise that I’m not afraid.
Not really.
I step into the water, sitting down when the bottom starts to slope down sharply. Like the hot springs near the village, it doesn’t go particularly deep - just enough that the water covers my chest when I sit. I shuffle over to Calran, meeting the liquid heat of his gaze one last time before turning around, settling in place between his thighs.
For a long moment, he doesn’t move. Long enough for me to realise the ache in my skin is need. That I want to feel his hands on me.
Then, with absolute gentleness, a hand settles on my shoulder.
He’s touched me here before. A claiming touch, but a safe one. Easy enough for me to duck out of it, and not coming close to intimate. Only, it feels very intimate now, his hand on my bare skin, so close to other bare places. His thumb traces a path along the edges of my shoulder blade, running up from the bottom, just a little pressure. When he reaches the top of my shoulder, he moves it back down, starts again, increasing the pressure a little. The muscles underneath click and crunch where he finds knots, and when he goes over them again, he presses a little harder.
Then his hand moves away. I hear the sluice of water a moment before he drips it over my back, the heat of it sinking into those tense, knotted muscles. When his hands return to my skin, he begins to knead my shoulders in earnest, chasing outevery little bundle of tension he finds until I’m liquid beneath his hands, so relaxed and content, I feel almost sleepy.
His fingers trace along my neck, the touch sending a pleasant shiver through me. I swallow, the pulsing between my thighs rising again. I might not be a doctor, but I do have some understanding of how the body works - the various fibres and vessels that lie underneath the skin. How the spinal cord is the central point of the nervous system - all messages to and from the various parts of the body travelling through it. But it seems to me like every time Calran touches me, he reroutes all those pathways, bypasses the spine entirely, the heat of his fingers travelling straight from wherever he touches me to my core. When his thumb passes over a particularly sensitive spot close to my jaw, a gasp escapes me.
Calran stills, his body tensing around me. Those big thighs of his seem to vibrate either side of my head, but he doesn’t move, except to circle that spot on my neck with his thumb again. The next sound that touch coaxes out of me is a whimper. A sound I’m quite sure I’ve never made before.
His words from last night come back to me.
There are many different ways that I would like to please you.
The jittery feeling fills my body again, but like before, I try just to feel it. To give it space but not give in to it. This is Calran with his hand on my neck. Calran who has been gentle and patient so far. Whose kisses make my soul light up. I promised I would try other things with him, and with his hand on my neck, heat throbbing at my core, it’s not difficult to feel curious about what those other things might be.
Touching. Tasting.
Calran’s thumb circles the sensitive spot on my neck once more, before moving down, brushing past my collar bone. He pauses a moment, as if waiting for me to protest, to freeze up,and when I don’t, he trails his hand lower, lower, until his fingers brush over the stiff peak of my nipple.
It’s like a jolt of electricity arcs through me. My body arches into the touch, pressing my breast into his hand. Calran rumbles approval, and that sound only intensifies the sensation as he pinches my nipple, rolling it between his thumb and forefinger.
My next intake of breath shudders in my lungs as his hand strokes across my chest, the other coming to join it, cupping, squeezing, pinching in all the right ways. I never knew any part of my body could feel so much sensation, that I was capable of being driven so high so quickly. I’m in danger of melting into a puddle at his feet.
Then he’s gone, his feet pulling out of the water. I feel his absence like a chill, but it doesn’t last long, his body sliding back into the pool behind me. This time, his thighs wrap around my thighs, his chest pressed to my back as he envelops me, his mouth coming to tease at the same spot on my neck his thumb was just exploring. In the heat of the water, his body shouldn’t feel warm, but everywhere his skin touches mine is molten.
Especially where his cock is pressed against my back.
