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A single tear spilled out and ran down my cheek. My pulse felt as if it was about to explode out of my chest as I tried to calm down. I could feel the strong arms around me hesitate in the tight grasp, but soon he gave me a squeeze, then relented and let me go.
“Sit,” he commanded, and I obeyed. I walked back to the lounge chair I was in before and sat down.
“Other one,” he motioned to the chair next to me, and I glanced over to it. “He was sitting in that chair.”
I swallowed the ache in my throat and moved over, relishing in the intricate detail. My hands rested on the velvet armrests, and the feeling hit me all over again.
He was here.
Caius’ eyes pierced through mine with a depth so significant, it felt dangerous.
“There’s nothing I want more than for you to be mine for the rest of time. I’d give everything for you, to be with you, and to have you. But you deserve more than just me,Meum Caelum,and if you think I’m going to let you sign your soul to me, tothis,you’re out of your fucking mind.”
Caius moved to sit at his usual spot at his desk. Reaching down, he opened one of the drawers and pulled out a white paper. He placed it on the surface of the desk and slid it over to me.
My wet, glossy eyes unlocked from his and moved down to the paper. With words that were too blurred for my eyes to read, there was a decent-sized paragraph and a signature line toward the bottom, but other than that, the page was blank.
But this was the page that everyone had been presented with. This was the page Ms. Scott just signed, that my uncle signed before he died, and that my other uncle is considering signing.
“Give me a pen,” I spoke, straightening my spine.
“Celeste,”Caius growled, and I shook my head.
“I’m not going to give you my blood. I just want to sign it.”
With a deep groan, Caius handed over a pen. I took it, uncapped it, and signed my name on the bottom of the page.
I wanted to feel what it felt like to promise myself to something else, something that I didn’t have the answers to until recently. It was a strange sight, seeing my name scribbled in ink on a page that determined where I would be for the rest of eternity.
But at the same time, I couldn’t feel anything at all. Maybe it was because I wasn’t fully committed, and I had no desire to be. At least, not anytime soon.
Maybe it was different for my uncle because he knew he didn’t have much time left.
Then again, does anyonereallyknow when it’s time?
I tilted my head at the paper as an idea struck me.Maybe I should sign over everything completely.
As if Caius was reading my thoughts, he voiced his concern. “Don’t even think about it.”
I looked up at him, and his intense stare fixed on mine.
“In order for the agreement to work, an entire handprint is needed,” he explained. “But I don’t want a singlefuckingdrop of your blood on that page, so don’t even think about it.”
My curiosity got the best of me as I asked, “Why don’t you want me here?”
Caius’ jaw ticked at my question. He rested his forearms on the desk and leaned forward. “Did you hear me, Celeste? There’s nothing I want more than to keep you. Every piece of mysoul is connected to you, intertwined with you, always, in every moment. My soul is yours, my body is yours. Every breath I take is yours. For you, and only you. I want all of you to myself.”
I watched as he momentarily wavered and broke his gaze with me.
“But you, your body and soul are bigger than this could ever be. Your essence exceeds anything this place has to offer. If there’s something better out there, I will never deprive you of it. You deserve more than this.”
A sudden ache in my chest bloomed. There has never been anyone besides my family that has viewed me as something worth more than an ordinary life. I have never felt that worthiness in such a drastic way, and his words made my soul swell. He was shielding me from Purgatory by directing me to Heaven. He was, in an odd way, protecting me from the mundane and offering me to Paradise.
“You will not commit to this. Understood?”
I could do nothing but nod in agreement. After all, I wasn’t ready to promise myself yet—if ever—so I had no problem with his demand.
“Did he say anything?” I muttered, changing the topic as I slid the bloodless paper back to him.
