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He swallowed audibly and shifted on his chair.
“Want your cock down my throat—fuck that. How about I lock the door and you let me eat your ass this time around? Or maybe you’d prefer to get on your knees for me?”
His eyelids fluttered shut. “Sean.”
“Yeah, Teach?” I whispered, my exhaustion long fucking gone from this game we played. Fuck, was he addictive.
“We can’t.”
“You mean you won’t.”
Matteo straightened his shoulders. It took him a few seconds, but he finally met my gaze straight on. “I ran into your brother a couple of weeks ago.”
“Micah?” I stupidly asked in my surprise over the abrupt topic change. “Where?”
He hesitated in answering while I wondered over why Micah hadn’t said anything to me in the handful of times I’d seen him since whenever his and Matteo’s paths had crossed.
“It doesn’t matter, but he shared about the situation your business is facing.”
My heart stutter-stepped inside my chest.
Matteo knew about Elite—what I’d done for a living up until the day Micah had told me to stop escorting. I’d never been ashamed of how I made my money, but Matteo was so damned wholesome…surely he would?—
“I’m not a judgmental prick,” Matteo said, obliterating where my thoughts travelled with that simple sentence and releasing the tension that had hitched my shoulders. He leaned forward, elbows on his desk, his gaze intent. “I would never look down on a person for their lifestyle, but taking a break from your work hasn’t lessened enough of your stress. I admire you, Sean, you’re one of the most focused students I have this year.”
I snorted even though those words of his lit me up inside. “Yeah, right.”
“I’m serious.” Matteo’s dark eyes bore into me with understanding and empathy I wanted to swim in. “But with what Elite is facing—I’m assuming it hasn’t yet been settled?”
“No,” I admitted.
Matteo nodded. “Drop some classes, Sean. You don’t have to prove anything to your father—or your brother. In our short conversation, I could sense Micah’s love for you, his admiration for your stubbornness. He isn’t waiting with an I told you so should you decide to quit.”
“I’m not a quitter,” I stated firmly, annoyed Matteo would even suggest I do such a thing.
Lies—I’d done that the first time around, which had only made me more determined now.
“I know you’re not, but I don’t believe you’re pushing yourself to your limits in order to fulfill a lifelong dream. So, are you slowly killing yourself for you or them, Sean?” Matteo asked quietly.
I opened my mouth but shut it once more without answering since I wasn’t exactly sure. Part of me wanted to state that getting an MBA to show my family I was something more than a directionless partier would be for me. But how long might that satisfaction last?
Would handing Pop a degree with my name on it even change his mind toward me? And what would that piece of paper earn me outside my being able to brag I’d worked hard for it?
Pop didn’t respect my lifestyle and never would. Hell, he hadn’t said a goddamned word about my lack of escorting or the fact I hadn’t gotten wasted since class started, both of which I’d mentioned at the dining room table the last time we’d gotten together at Micah’s for our monthly family meal.
Mom had beamed at me for giving up my party boy ways, but Pop?
Nothing.
He couldn’t even be proud of my investments that continued to thrive. A lot of Bostonians would kill for the life I had—and I wasn’t satisfied, believing a degree would get me further ahead somehow?
“Countless hours of therapy didn’t help me realize it was okay to live again, to focus on possible good things I’ve been missing out on.”
I shifted my attention to Matteo, not having realized I’d stared at his desk, lost in thought once again. God, the words off that man’s delicious tongue messed with my brain.
He smiled, his focus flitting over my face. “It took a blond, sassy brat to shake me from my stupor, to show me that joy doesn’t have to be restricted to the only places I’d known before.”
My mind went straight to flirt mode along with my body. “You want me,” I sang, running my hands down my chest. “You think I’m sexy.”
