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“Wouldn’t you be considered a contractor?”
“I don’t have to be.” I could look at the books once a week. Once a month. I didn’t fucking care. I needed one of my jobs taken off my plate.
Curtis nodded. “I thought Barnaby would’ve made sure to cover all the bases. Wasn’t he specific?”
“He paid Lorenzo to cover the bases,” I said, leaving out my suspicions. “The trust only insists we work for the ranch.”
“The same Lorenzo who knew he’d be working closely with all of you and who knew it’d be best to stay in your good graces,” Lauri filled in.
I shrugged. I never claimed to know legal bullshit, but I knew enough to get myself out of this mess. What worked for me could work for my brothers. And yeah, we’d play awfully nice with Lorenzo if he was looking out for future generations along with his largest account.
I’d like to think my father kept the parameters open to interpretation, to give us some sort of breathing room, but he never had before.
“So, that’s it? No grandkids?” Lauri had one leg crossed over the other, and her foot bobbed with a pensive energy. Was she sad, like me, and afraid to let down Meg?
“You’re always welcome for however long you want to stay. You always have been.” They rarely utilized it until after Meg passed. Unlike me, my in-laws thrived in their careers.
“The drive takes a solid day,” Curtis said gruffly. “Sunup to sundown—when the roads are good enough.”
Meaning much of the winter was iffy. I nodded and stomped down the guilt. They were grandparents. They had to know this was best for the kids. But when and how often they visited was up to them.
“But we do have a lot of vacation we should start using.” Lauri rotated the lid of her cup. “Does this decision have anything to do with your pretty young nanny?”
Her tone was carefully neutral, but I wished she’d show what she was thinking. I didn’t want to fear moving on. Did they think it was too soon for me to meet someone? Would they ever approve? Would their reaction impact their relationship with the kids?
“She’s, uh, not as young as you think.” Tova’s age shouldn’t matter, but I didn’t know how unstable the ground I treaded on was. “And no. Tova’s leaving for California after the performance.”
I dropped my gaze to the floor. The conversation about keeping the kids had been a nice reprieve from thinking about my discussion with her last night.
“But there is something between you two?” Curtis asked, his jaw tense.
I drew in a slow breath. As much as I’d avoided thinking about my in-laws finding out about my non-relationship, I’d also played through different scenarios until I came to a conclusion. “Please know it’s with my sincerest respect that I say it’s none of your business.”
Lauri’s inhale was sharp. A red flush crept up Curtis’s face.
I couldn’t leave it at that. “No matter what, I want you to know that what Meg and I had was real. If she was...” My voice broke. I missed my wife, but I wasn’t the same guy she’d been married to. I was a different version of Alcott Knight. “If she was still here, we wouldn’t be talking about this. She and I would still be arguing about when to move away from Buffalo Gully, and I swear I wouldn’t put it past her to die in order to prove she was right and I was wrong.”
The comment might’ve been in poor taste, but no one had known Meg like the three of us. She’d have made the same joke. A fond smile graced Curtis’s face. Lauri ducked her head.
“And for a long time,” I continued, my voice rough, “I didn’t think the kids and I would get out of the status of us being us but without her. The thing is, without her, we’re not the same. I’m not. The kids aren’t. And we have to continue our lives, learning what makes us happy now.”
Lauri blinked but a single tear escaped down her cheek. Curtis cleared his throat, but his eyes were squeezed shut, and he was pinching the bridge of his nose.
I clenched my jaw. I said what I had to say. About Meg. About Tova. About the move.
The back door creaked open. Tova peered out, her eyes wide, as she took in Lauri and Curtis fighting their grief. “Oh my god. I’m sorry.”
“No,” I said, practically jumping up. Dressed in the multicolored long skirt that showed off her hips and a tight white crop top that revealed a strip of bare abdomen, she was a vision. “We were just talking. About everything.”
Clarity dawned in her gaze, and I lifted a shoulder, a silent communication that they’d figured it out, or I wouldn’t have outed us.
“I didn’t realize it’s so late.” I couldn’t think of what else to say to diffuse the discomfort in the air. “Did we miss lunch?”
“No, I’m early.” She was still in the doorway, too afraid to come out farther. I wanted to reassure her it was fine but I was scared anything I did would send her scurrying away.
“Tova!” Grayson streaked out of the sandbox and sprinted to Tova.
She stepped out, letting the screen door shut behind her.
