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‘We’ll see.’ Which usually means ‘yes’.
Christian pokes his tongue out and Oliver throws the ruler back at him, reluctantly going back to his homework.
‘So, everything’s normal and nobody’s missing me too much yet?’ I ask Dad.
‘Everything’s normal and we’re all missing youplenty,’ he tells me. He takes me into the kitchen next, where Gina’s in the middle of sorting out dinner, holding the phone out so my stepmum can say hi and get a run-down of my week before they have to go. I say goodbye, stomach grumbling like I can smell the casserole Gina was cooking, and I feel a pang that I’m not back at home with them.
At uni, home was only an hour’s train ride away, so I had my fair share of weekends back there, enjoying some proper home-cooked meals and a washing machine I didn’t have to pay to use … And with everybody politely not mentioning that I was only home because once again, I didn’t have plans with either old friends from schoolorthe girls in my halls. After the failed midterm and breaking up with my boyfriend, I abandoned the social clubs I’d joined purely in an attempt to make some friends, unwilling to risk my future just so I could look back and say, ‘Sure, I didn’t get the grades I wanted and missed out on those jobs, but you know what? I played atonof netball.’
I didn’t get homesick. I visited too often, and if I stayed at uni it was because I was so busy studying, focused only on the day when all of this would be behind me and I’d be a successful, independent grown-up. Then, I wouldn’t waste time worrying over whythe girls suddenly went quiet when I came into the kitchen, or burst out giggling as I left the room. I’d be capable, and put-together, and unfazed by such things.
I guess I haven’t had chance to feel homesick since coming to London for the internship yet, either – not until now, when it hits hard. I think about spending the next three months here, far away and probably hardly going home at all. Will my brothers look all grown up by the time I can visit next? Will they miss me over summer, or forget all about me? I’ll miss them when they go to Spain next month – the first family holiday I won’t be part of.
A shiver runs through me, and I hug my knees to me a little tighter – but it’s not from the chill of an early summer breeze; it’s the uneasy realization thatthisis what growing up means, and all of a sudden I’m barrelling towards it with the brakes cut. I’ve been so focused on what my future is going to look like that I forgot some of what I’m leaving behind.
It’s all for the best though.
It has to be.
From:[email protected]
To:[email protected], [email protected], & four others
cc:[email protected], [email protected], & seven others
Subject:VISITTOLABS–THISWEDNESDAY
Hello, interns!
Hope this email finds you well – or at the very least, not crying in the toilets because we’ve scared you off already.
I’ve arranged a trip to the Arrowmile labs and factory this week to meet with some of our product development, testing and research teams and to get a first-hand look at some of our products. If you’re lucky, you’ll get to test-drive something. If you’re unlucky, you’ll end up breaking it and live in shame for the rest of the summer.
The minibus will collect you all from the office at 9 a.m. – please be prompt. To those of you cc’d, we encourage you to come along, but as your roles don’t directly interface with thework in the labs, it’s not mandatory. If you are interested in joining,please let me know by end of day TODAY.
KR,
N.
Not two minutes after I finish reading Nadja’s email late on Monday morning, I get a ‘reply all’ from intern Freya with a profuse apology that she won’t be able to make it but to please let her know of any future opportunities.
The group WhatsApp lights up on my phone immediately as Monty calls her out for being the first ‘reply all’ of the summer with a string of laughing faces. I snort, then look back at the email, then type ‘KR email sign off’ into Google to find out that it stands for ‘kind regards’, which – duh, of course it does.
My own email sign-off has gone through a few turns, seeing what other people are using and what feels right for me. Apparently, this is a mark of my personalityandprofessionalism in one fell swoop. I know it will form part of people’s first impressions of me this summer, so it matters.
‘Cheers’ doesn’t feel very like me, and ‘best wishes’ seems cringey and cutesy.
I’m not bold enough for Nadja’s ‘KR’ and single initial, which I think must require a certain degree of daring that I definitely do not possess.
‘Sincerely Yours’ has a nice ring to it, though. That’s what I’ve settled on.
I drag the attachment Nadja sent through with her email into my calendar, wincing when I realize it clashes with a few things – including my lunch with Molly (the previous Marketing intern who is now running the department). I know it’s not a big deal in the grand scheme of things, but she’s the personIwant to be. She’s someone I could learn from – maybe even ask to mentor me, if I’m lucky.
Dejected, I send her a cancellation with a note explaining, and ask as politely as I can to let me know another time she might be available. When she pops up in the bottom corner of my laptop screen with a message on Teams a few minutes later, my heart actually skips a beat.
Molly Phelps
Hey, Anna! I’m free for the next hour if you are?
