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“You’re an animal,” my dad scoffs, shaking his head from side to side as he unscrews the cork.
“I know,” Austin winks, his cap backwards on his head and as my father places the bottle on the table uncorked, he leans across to his left and swats Austin’s hat off his head.
“Manners, boy.” He groans, wrapping his fingers back round the bottle and topping all of our glasses up.
I smile, my eyes roaming the table. I hadn’t even realized I sat in my exact seat I used too as a kid. We all have.
Dad at the head of table, naturally.
Austin to his left.
Mom to his right.
And me? I was nestled next to Austin.
“I just want to say,” my dad clears his throat as he holds his glass of wine in the air, “we’re glad you’re back and home, Penny,” he uses Austin’s nickname and my cheeks pinch scarlet, my eyes glassy. “And I will pray every night and every morning that this is for good, because God, we have missed you,” he chokes slightly and my mom gives him a sad smile, her hand resting on his and I feel a snap on one of my heart strings.
“I’m here for a while, so…” I smile but keep my eyes down on my empty plate. I couldn’t look at them. I couldn’t let them see the truth that dances in my eyes.
“Well, my prayers are already being answered,” my dad beams as my mom begins to dish his food up which causes a tut and roll of the eyes. “I don’t know how many times I have to tell you woman, I can dish my own damn food up,” he growls but not in an aggressive way. My parents are the definition of soulmates. They adore each other. Sure, they piss each other off; but at the end of the day, they always say good night, I love you and seal it with a kiss no matter how mad they may have been earlier in the day.
We were always bought up to never go to bed on an argument with someone you love.
“I know darling, and like I have told you for the past forty-eight years, I like doing it for you,” she leans across and kisses him on the cheek and my heart thumps in my chest.
I dreamed for a love like my mom and dad’s, and I thought I had finally found it, but me being here alone just proves that it wasn’t meant to be.
I swallow down the bile, my chest tightening as I try and will my mind to not go back to Luke and eventually, I dish my own food up.
“I heard Tripp has had a few issues with the ranch a few miles down; Bluebeak.” Austin breaks the comfortable silence and my eyes volley between him and my father.
I watch as my dad’s brow forms a deep V, wrinkling his forehead more prominently.
“Why?” he asks, but not lifting his eyes to meet Austin.
“Clay has been trying to sell livestock along to a farmer out of town, and without papers nonetheless, so he can avoid Marty because he is the livestock commissioner. I’ll be honest, from what Tripp and Riggs were saying, Clay down at Bluebeak is just pissed because his old buddy Trevor has left. We both know he was lining his pretty pockets now,” Austin shakes his head from side to side and his lip curls with disgust, his eyes blackening as he stabs his vegetables with his fork.
“I don’t get these young fools. Rules are rules.” My dad hums, speaking with his mouthful and my mom tuts at his manners.
“Well, rules are garbage according to Clay.”
My dad grumbles something under his breath that none of us can decipher.
“What does Pacey think of it all?” My mom pipes up as my dad continues to ramble to himself, the odd head shake from side to side occasionally as he listens.
“Ugh,” Austin sighs and I can see the weight bearing on his slim shoulders, “you know Pacey. He is a big kid. Tripp thought by making him a livestock agent that he would knuckle down a little… but he just sees this as a joke I think.”
“Silly boy.”
“Yeah,” Austin roughs his hair up with his hand as he shovels a spoonful of mash into his mouth.
I sit quietly, nibbling on my food because my anxiety is suffocating me. I feel so welcome but so out of place at the same time. Like a misplaced object that doesn’t quite know where it should be sat.
“Aspen, sweetie, are you okay?” my mom asks me and forces my eyes up to meet hers. My eyes pin to hers and my mouth drops open softly as I swallow the dryness down.
“Yeah, well, I think so,” I laugh softly, my eyes moving from her to my dad then Austin. “I am very out the loop,” I nod quickly, pushing my food round my plate, “and I know that’s my fault,” I rush out before any of them can swipe me down with a comment.
“Well, I can give you a quick rundown if you want?” Austin’s brows lift, his hazel eyes glued to mine.
