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It’s a curious thought—right now, anyway. After weeks of trying, I’ve finally reached my goal of number four. And yet, I am pondering Levi’s arms.Huh.
That’s pretty crazy when I can officially check item four off my list after all this time. And unlike coffee—I love it. My regular exercise is going to be riding my bike wherever I go. In fact, number seven—learn to drive a car, might be obsolete now. Because I am going to bike everywhere.
Err—as soon as I get the brakes down.
Which Levi says should be today.
He isn’t wrong. Two more laps around the park and I’m braking like a champ.
“Oh my gosh. Wait until Nikki sees me!”
“Who’s Nikki?” Levi says, ironically sitting down on the bench where I first met my young friend.
“She’s my thirteen-year-old friend.”
“Huh.”
“I know you have a thing with age, so I’m throwing it out there right now. I have a friend, and she is an entire decade younger than me.” I plop next to him, sitting close enough so that my thigh brushes his. It sends a small tingle into my leg that spreads up to my heart and down to my toes. It’s a strange feeling—that I love.
“I do not have athingwith age.” He turns his head to peer over at me, brows furrowed. Those brows are the best. They make me smile. “I don’t,” he says.
“Okay.”
“I don’t.”
“I believe you.”
But something about the way I say it must scream FALSE because he huffs out a growl.Uncle Bear.Very appropriate, Miss Alice.
Levi sighs, the heat in his tone and posture dissolving. “Do I get to see your list now?”
Oh, the list. Uncle Bob knows about my list, but not even he has seen it. But then, a deal is a deal. I’m riding. And Levi just wants a peek atme. Because that’s what my list is—an insight into my inner self. And I’m okay with him seeing it. I think I’ve been swayed by his thick arms and fabulous brows.
And maybe his kindness, too.
Because heiskind. He is gentle. And thoughtful. I’ve seen so much of him these past weeks. I want to give him this piece of me.
“Yes. You get to see the list.”
“You said it’s always on you.” He leans forward a little, his eyes scanning as if it may produce itself at any second.
I nod and pull my phone from my pocket. “It is.” I snap off my phone case and peel the notebook paper from its place inside.
“Paper and pen? Not digital?”
I fill my lungs, my chest puffing. “No. I needed to write this out. Physically. This is part of me.”
He doesn’t laugh at me or even look at me like I’m crazy—he’s given me that look before, I’m not stupid. But he’s thoughtful now—no judgments. “And these are things you haven’t had the chance to do due to… your circumstances?”
“Yes. And things I want to do. Proof that Meredith Bess Porter lived.” I breathe in and make note of the sun on my cheeks. It always reminds me that I’m alive and well.
I’m breathing and thinking when—“Ouch! Hey!”
Levi pinched me. It wasn’t hard and it didn’t hurt, but my instincts told me that it should, that I should probably be crying out in pain.
“Sorry,” he says with a chuckle. “Just making certain for myself that you’re a real girl.”
I flutter my eyes in a roll, but mostly I chuckle with him. Still, my heart thumps in my ears. Passing over a piece of yourself is scary. Even when you want to do it. I clench my jaw and hold tight to the folded notebook paper that’s yet to reveal any of my truths.
