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The back door slams behind me, and I stomp down the steps, each heavy footfall a reflection of my foul mood. Leave it to my father to have the world’s worst fucking timing. The one day I actually want to knock off early to handle some personal business, and suddenly, he can’t run the ranch without me.
When I reach the grass, I stop and turn to look back at the house to make sure nobody is following me, relieved to see I'm alone. I'm not in any mood to talk, and if one of my brothers comes after me, I can’t be held responsible for the damage they’ll sustain.
Just as I’m about to turn back toward my cabin, I feel eyes on me. Several people are moving about the ranch, but they're focused on finishing chores before supper, not on me. Still, I can't shake the feeling.
Movement in an upstairs window catches my eye. I squint, trying to make out who's watching me from the guest room, but the sun’s reflection is high enough on the glass that it obscures them enough that I can’t see a face.Fuckin’ creepy.
Not wanting an audience for whatever the fuck emotion I'm currently experiencing, I turn my back on whoever it is and stride toward my cabin and precious solitude.
My phone buzzes in my pocket, and my steps falter briefly, the weak fool inside of me wondering if—hoping—it’s Darby.
With a low, frustrated growl, determined not to give her another thought, assuming it's her who texted, I force myself forward, ignoring the greetings from farmhands until I’m alone once again and safe from…everything.
Slumping against the back of the door, I focus on my breathing, trying to bring it back to normal, despite the anger radiating off of me in waves.
Just when I feel myself gaining control, my phone buzzes for the second time in as many minutes, interrupting my focused breathing and sending me spiraling yet again into an all-consuming rage.
Thrusting my hand in my pocket, my fingers close around my phone hard enough that I'm surprised the screen doesn’t crack when I finally pull it free. Unlocking it, I see several notifications, but none are from Darby, so I shove it back into my pocket.
With a resigned sigh, I stand up straight and make my way across the open plan room to the kitchen, grabbing a beer from the fridge and a bag of pretzels from the counter before dropping unceremoniously onto the leather sofa.
Toeing off my boots and grimacing at the dried mud caked around the soles, which is no doubt sprinkled throughout the cabin by now, I unscrew the cap and down nearly half the beer in one go before leaning back. My sock-covered feet find their usual spot on the old wooden trunk that serves as a coffee table, and I close my eyes and finally breathe a sigh of relief.
Most guys my age would probably see a secluded cabin as a bachelor pad and a place to bring women. I won't deny that the privacy it offers is convenient for hookups, but I built this place when I turned eighteen with one thing in mind—solitude.
Living on a working ranch is not as peaceful as one might think. People are constantly coming and going. Some things require us to work or sleep at weird times. Before I moved out here, I had to share a house with my dad and brothers. They're good guys, but fuck me, are they noisy.
Dad is up before dawn to get the day started and has no awareness of how loud his movements are. Gage has insomnia and paces his room or goes for a run to exhaust himself, and Brooks has to have some kind of background noise to fall asleep. I, on the other hand, have to have total darkness and quiet to actually have a chance at falling asleep.
Blindly reaching for the bag beside me, I grab a fistful of pretzels and toss a few into my mouth, enjoying the flavor—salty andbitter, just like my soul. When I’m done chewing, I polish off the beer and lazily wedge the empty bottle between the couch cushions. If Darby were here, she’d immediately jump up and get me another, but no. Those thoughts stop right fucking now.
I have to remind myself that it was fun while it lasted. She was a fun pastime. That’s all we were to each other. A convenient fuck when either of us needed a release. We weren’t friends, so there were no benefits. We were fuck buddies, a booty call, nothing more. But fuck me, if she didn’t take my cock like a champ, always so eager for me.
My head falls back against the cushion and one arm covers my eyes as I remember the last time we were together. Darby was perfect because we both knew the score.
Just last week, she was riding me right here on the couch, her big tits bouncing in my face, nipples just begging for my mouth as she screamed out in ecstasy and shattered around me. Before she'd recovered from her orgasm, I flipped us over, pinning her beneath me on her back and rutted into her like a feral beast until I exploded inside of her.
Pulling out, I fell to the side, breathing hard. We stayed like that until our breathing returned to normal. When I recovered, I walked bare-assed into my shower without a word. When I was clean and dressed again, she'd already snuck out under the cover of darkness. Ours was a fucking perfect arrangement.
Now, it's over. With a one-minute phone call. I'd thought we were just having fun and things were going well. But of course, as usual, I'm the last to know when something isn't workingwith a girl. I haven't tried to have a relationship often because they always end badly. I finally came to the realization that the common denominator in each failed attempt is me. After that, it seemed easier to just avoid them altogether.
Last year, after a nasty breakup, when Darby proposed our arrangement, it sounded like the perfect solution for both of us. While I lived in the moment, after a while, Darby decided she wanted more. She just wants more with someone else…someone new.
I should've seen it coming. Women always leave. It took me several years to forgive my mother for leaving. As a young kid, I didn't really understand that she didn't have a choice in the matter. One day, she was here; the next, she was just gone.
It took dad years to start dating seriously. He spent all of his free time taking care of us and the ranch. He finally found Kelly, and the five of us were one big, happy family. Until we weren't.
We got home from school one day, and instead of a hug and plate of cookies from Kelly, we were greeted by Simona. The smile on her face didn't quite reach her eyes, and the plate she held in her hands had gooey brownies—the ultimate consolation treat for three young boys. That was the day my heart hardened as I realized she chose to walk away from us.
It wasn't until years later, after my own first broken heart, that dad sat me down and told me the truth about the day she left. Kelly wanted her own children, Dad didn't. She left the next morning without a backward glance.
I tried a few more times, hoping against hope that I could break the cycle, but each time things ended, I became more closed off until my distrust of women extended into every facet of my life. My grandmother moved to Florida the year I graduated high school to escape the cold and passed away the following year. With her gone, Simona is the only woman who hasn't left me. Yet.
The longer I sit and think about it, the more my anger and resentment grow. Darby swore she wasn’t seeing anyone else, but I wouldn't put it past her. Images fill my mind of hate-fucking her into the mattress, forcing orgasm after orgasm out of her until she's begging me to stop and continue our arrangement.
My phone buzzes again, and I can't help but hope it's Darby begging me to reconsider and forget she wanted to end things. I could summon her over in her sluttiest outfit and tie her to my bed with the lariat hanging on the headboard. I'd strip her first, eat her pussy and make her ride my hand until she was begging for release. Then, I would stand up and walk away, leaving her spread out bare, giving her plenty of time to regret her decision.
Shifting onto one asscheek, I pull my phone loose, growling when I see Brooks's dopey grin lighting up the screen. That's one way to get my dick to go limp real quick. So much for rubbing one out to my revenge fuck fantasies.
