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I don’t even try to hold back, releasing inside her. Part of me hopes that her birth control fails. I’m ready to start my life with her. Sure, a baby right now would complicate things even further, but maybe her mother would disown her, too, and we could ride off into the sunset. We could settle here in Willow River and live happily ever after.
Jordyn rests her head on my shoulder, her body slumped against mine. My cock is still buried inside her. “I cherish every moment with you, Ryder Kincaid.”
I wrap my arms around her and hold her as tightly as I can without hurting her. “Me too, sweets. Me, too.”
CHAPTER EIGHT
Jordyn
I wake up to the feel of Ryder’s lips on my bare shoulder. “Morning, sweets.”
“Morning,” I croak.
“You grab the first shower while I make us breakfast.”
I glance at him over my shoulder, mindful of my morning breath. “You’re not going to shower with me?”
“Oh, I want to, but I’m not going to. We’ll never leave this house today if we start out with your naked, wet, soapy body beneath my fingertips.” He grins and kisses my shoulder once more. He smacks my ass gently and rolls out of his side of the bed.
“Why do we have to leave the house?”
“Because as much as I want to keep you in bed, I know we can’t. I want to spend time with you being us. The us we were before you left.”
“We can’t risk being seen.”
“Trust me.”
I nod. “I’ll get in the shower.”
“That’s my girl.” He bends over me, bracing his hands on the bed, and presses his lips to my forehead. When he stands to his full height and pulls on a pair of gym shorts, I watch his every move, just soaking in this time with him. “Get moving, sweets. We’re burning daylight.” With that, he walks out of the room.
Clutching my bag, I grab my toiletries and make my way into his bathroom. Pulling open the shower curtain, I freeze when I see all of my shower stuff inside. The same shampoo and conditioner, and body wash. There’s even my pink body scrubber. I don’t understand what I’m seeing.
Stepping out of the bathroom, I snatch up Ryder’s discarded shirt from last night and slip it on before padding down the hall to the kitchen. I stop and watch him as he whisks eggs in a bowl. He looks up and smiles.
“What’s up?” he asks, placing the bowl on the island.
“I was about to get into the shower.”
“Is something wrong? Are you feeling okay?” He makes his way toward me and places his hands on my shoulders.
“I’m okay.”
“What’s bothering you?”
“I pulled back the shower curtain, and all my stuff’s there. Well, not my stuff, but the stuff that I use.” I know I’m rambling, but I’m rushing to get the words out while I still try to understand why. Are they mine? Do they belong to someone else? Ryder wouldn’t do that, right? Maybe one of his sisters-in-law? My mind is racing, trying to understand.
“They’re yours, sweets.”
“You bought them?”
“No. They’re yours.”
“Mine?”
“They were yours when you would stay over.”
“You kept them?”
He shrugs. “You still have a drawer in my dresser too.”
“Ryder.”
“I’ll throw them away, the shower stuff, I mean. Now that you’re back. I mean, I know you can’t use them. I’m sure they’re expired.”
“Why did you keep them, Ry?”
“I wasn’t willing to toss anything that reminded me of you. But you’re here now, and we can replace them with new ones.”
“You kept them.” I know I’m repeating his words, but I’m trying to wrap my head around this.
He grips my hips and lifts me. On instinct, I wrap my legs around his waist as he carries me to the island and sets me down. “Tossing them felt final, Jordyn. I couldn’t do that. In here”—he places his hand over his heart—“I knew you would come back to me. Until then, I needed every piece of you I still had surrounding me.”
Tears fall from my eyes. I blink hard, trying to stop them, but it’s no use. “I’m so sorry,” I sob, and he wraps me in a hug.
“Don’t cry, baby. It’s all in the past. We’re moving forward.”
“I-I’m trying to move past it, but every single time I see you here hurting from my actions, and those of my family, my heart aches. You kept my things, Ryder.” The guilt I’m feeling weighs heavily on my heart. This man, this incredible man—I don’t deserve him.
“I don’t deserve you.”
“You do deserve me, Jordyn. Did you want to leave me?”
“No.”
“Did you want to pretend I didn’t exist?” His voice cracks.
“No.”
“You were protecting me. Protecting my family. You were so fucking selfless, Jordyn. You did what you had to do, and, baby, I love you for it. Were the last two years pure hell without you? Yes, but you’re here and we’re going to figure this out. I promise you, Jordyn.”
