AllFreeNovel
Share Us
He told her, not sparing any detail. About what had happened on the shout, about the rush to the hospital after the call every RNLI family dreads. The endless waiting around, trying to get information out of a Covid-fatigued skeleton staff overrun and overworked on Christmas Eve. The awful, awful saying goodbye to a husk of a body which had once been his much-loved, vibrant father. Coming back to a house which had only one person missing but which felt like an echoing, empty shell and was no longer home. The utter shock and bewilderment.
‘Mum fell apart, not surprisingly. They’d been married for over thirty years. Didn’t quite make their thirty-fifth anniversary. Merryn went into herself; it was horrible to witness. I had to keep everyone together, as well as sort out the minefield of all the paperwork.’ He shuddered. ‘God, that seemed endless. It was just as well, in a way, I’d moved back after splitting up with Rose.’
Honor sucked in a breath, inhaling his hurt. ‘It must have been, and probably still is, an awful thing to go through. I’m so sorry, Jago.’
He picked up her hand, turned it and kissed her palm. ‘Thank you,’ he said, in a voice guttural with emotion. Releasing it, he straightened and took a long draught of beer, making an attempt to control his emotions. ‘You can see why I warned you it would bring the mood low,’ he said, drily. Clearing his throat, he added, ‘By the way, Rose is my ex-wife. Very amicable divorce, we’re huge friends and she’s getting married next year to a great bloke. I’m very happy for her and she’s very much an ex-wife.’ He managed a smile. ‘I can’t wait for you to meet her. She’ll love you.’
Honor returned the smile. ‘In that case, I’d love to.’ She put her hand on his shoulder, moving it up to caress his cheek. There was a slight red mark where the glue had stuck Santa’s beard on. She reached forward and kissed it gently. ‘And, as to bringing the mood down, I said I wanted to know all about you. No more secrets, no more crossed wires or misunderstandings. I want to know what makes Jago Pengethley tick.’
He looped an arm around her shoulder and brought her close. ‘Well, now you know why, every now and again, I might struggle with Christmas, certainly this year and maybe in the future. The trouble is, it’s so difficult to avoid.’
As if to underline his point, a chorus of, ‘I Wish it Could Be Christmas Everyday’, blasted out from the adjoining bar.
Honor felt a sigh reverberate through him and rested her hand on his stomach, feeling the rise and fall of his breathing. He’d been through so much, was still going through so much. But he’d obviously been the one who’d held his little family together. She’d witnessed his tenderness with Avril and Merryn and could understand it from a different perspective now. Her heart swelled with feeling for him. She wanted this man in her life. She wanted it very much.
They sat there for a while, each lost in their thoughts, enjoying the simplicity of being warm and close to one another, breathing the same rhythm.
‘Another drink?’ he asked eventually. ‘Beer’s not really hitting the mark tonight, I think I’ll get a whisky. What about you?’
She shook her head. ‘I’m fine thanks.’ She watched him as he stood up. Her feelings had been tender and protective but, as he pulled off his sweatshirt to reveal a T-shirt and she caught a glimpse of dark-haired muscle underneath, she felt a coil of hot lust. He really was a very beautiful man.
When he returned, she’d got herself under control.
‘I brought you a drink anyway.’ He put another mulled wine down. ‘The bar’s so busy, it was a rugby scrum to get these in.’ Throwing down an assortment of packets of nuts and crisps, he added, ‘To soak up the alcohol.’ He grinned wickedly, ‘After all, haven’t you been at the doctored hot chocolate?’
‘Oh yes,’ she pulled a comical expression. ‘I’d forgotten about that. You wait until I see Tracy!’
He sat down and shoved a hand through his curls, making them even more unruly. ‘She seems nice. Mum says she’s from Cornwall.’
‘She’s great fun.’ Honor screwed up her face. ‘I’m still adjusting to thinking of Avril being yourmum.’
He twisted round to her. ‘Why did you think I was married to her?’
She explained about seeing them all in the café on the evening of Merryn’s first day. She felt her face heat. ‘I’ve been so unprofessional. I jumped to the obvious conclusion, and I really shouldn’t have. And you were so good with Merryn, I always got fatherly vibes off you, not big brother ones.’
He pulled a regretful face. ‘I suppose I’ve stepped into that role and I genuinely enjoy her company. You never know what to expect next from her.’
‘That’s very true.’ Honor paused and thought back over all the conversations she’d had with the Pengethleys. ‘Did I miss anything? The file from her old school hasn’t come through yet otherwise I would have read up on her background and would know your family dynamics. I usually ring the school the pupil has come from, but I have to confess to not having the time. It all got a bit hectic towards the end of term and the parents or guardians of the child normally tell me what I need to know. As Avril didn’t say anything, I made an assumption, another assumption, that there was nothing untoward. Actually,’ she said, ‘on reflection, with something that vital, you’d expect the other school to let the new one know. It’s important that we do.’
‘To be honest, it doesn’t surprise me they haven’t. We weren’t very happy with how they handled it. It was an enormous school, with several acting members of senior management staff. They were trying to cope but didn’t do us many favours.’
‘I still feel awful. I feel I’ve let Merryn down!’
Jago shook his head. ‘Don’t feel awful. You certainly haven’t let her down. She loves being at St Winifred’s and especially in your class. It’s perfect for her. You hadn’t missed anything. Or at least, you hadn’t missed anything we didn’t want to tell you. When Mer went back to school after Dad died, she had a really tough time. She’s always been a bit different to the other kids, quicksilver smart and a bit eccentric, only now, on top of all that, she was the child whose father had died in sudden and tragic circumstances. She was a magnet for bullies. Any counselling we found for her, and any strategies put in place by the school didn’t work, in fact they made things worse.’ He took a breath. ‘When we moved here, we made the decision not to say anything about what had happened to us, at least for a while, to give us, and mostly Merryn, the chance to find her feet without all that notoriety hanging around her. We just all wanted, craved I suppose, a fresh start. It’s why we moved to Lullbury Bay. To each find our way without having tragedy hovering over us.’
Honor thought back to the night in The Old Anchor when she’d met up with her friends. ‘It might not be possible for much longer,’ she said slowly. ‘From what Jamie said, one evening in the pub, I think he’s linked you with what happened to your father.’
Jago nodded. ‘I had a chat with him about it. Came clean. As he’s a volunteer with the RNLI, he’s in the circles to know about when there’s a loss. It’s a tightly knit world and Pengethley is an unusual surname.’
‘Jamie’s lovely, he’ll be as discreet as you want him to be. He won’t gossip about you. I can’t say the same for some others in this town though. Gossip’s a life force for some people.’
‘I think we’re resigned to the information getting out eventually. We just wanted a little time to ourselves before it did.’
She nodded slowly. ‘I understand. And I’m relieved I didn’t miss anything. It would be useful to have a chat in the new year about what we can put in place for Merryn, though.’ She frowned. ‘I’m surprised Merryn herself hasn’t once mentioned anything.’
‘She’s stopped talking about it. Hardly talks about Dad at all. It’s understandable but worrying. I’ve been having a few chats with Verity Lincoln, you know, the vicar? She mentioned there’s a children’s grief charity nearby.’
Honor nodded. ‘There is. We can refer her. They’re excellent. And I think being around other children who have suffered the same loss will help. They do talking therapy too. I’ll get onto it first thing in the new term, after talking it through with Avril first, of course.’ She bit her lip and blushed. ‘I do feel a fool for thinking you and Avril were married though.’
