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“Okay.” It wasn't an acceptable excuse, but I was going to go along with it for argument's sake.
“It's not, and I'm sorry. I will try harder.” She gave my arm two quick taps. “I was watching you two tonight, and it's undeniable the attraction you share. He's happier than he's been in a long time, and I know you are responsible for it. It’s just for many years, I’ve hated the very idea of you, so it’s hard to undo that, but I’m trying. Can you understand that?”
“Maybe.” It was the stupidest response, but it was all I had.
“Eventually, I’d like us to be friends again, but I know it will take some time. On both our parts.” Her hands fell into her lap, and instinctively, mine did the same. “Can I ask what are your long-term plans? Carter said you were working until Christmas at Daisy & Dahlia's, but after that?”
“I don't know.”
“How can you not know?” Just like her brother, she tipped her head to the side and sent a curious look in my direction.
My gaze fell to my clasped hands. “I just don't. The job situation isn't confirmed beyond that yet, and the housing situation...”
“Yes, I heard you were staying in a joke of a motel.”
Wow, he’d shared that? “Yeah. I can pay weekly so until I find a place to stay, that's what I'm doing. But I need to find a steady job first.”
“And Stanley?”
“We agreed on five weeks. Nothing is written, nor confirmed, for after the Christmas season.”
“So you're essentially jobless by the new year?”
I ran my focus over her pristine cream-coloured blouse, and counted a few pearls on her necklace before my gaze settled on her face. It wasn’t angry, or judgy but rather … compassionate. “Not yet. I have plans, well, ideas, but I can't get them to fruition. Truth be told, I’m feeling a little lost.”And surprised that I actually said that thought out loud.
“Have you mentioned them to Carter? He has a lot of connections. We both do. I’m sure we can help.”
I shook my head. “No, but thank you. Not telling him probably makes me a bad person. Things are going so well between us, and it’s like we’ve picked right up from just before he moved to Europe. Everything feels right, and now that I know the truth about why he dumped me, it makes it easier to move forward.”
“I imagine it would.”
“But I know I can’t keep renting a motel, but without a job, there isn’t an anchor to keep me here, and I’m so scared. I don’t want to fill him with false hope when I don’t have much luck in locating something here.” Voicing it brought forth a whole new level of fear. It was one thing to think about it, but when I said it and saw the pitiful expression on Bea’s face, it gutted me.
“Basically, by the end of the month, you’ll likely be jobless and homeless, am I hearing you correctly?”
I bobbed my head although I wasn’t homeless per se. I could still rent the motel room weekly; it just wasn’t ideal. “Yes, likely.”
“And what then? You just going to dump my brother again when you move back to Red Deer?” In one sentence, her whole attitude changed. Gone was the soft-spoken, caring big sister tone to one of indignation, and if I wasn’t wrong, it was tinged in hatred again.
“Hey, I didn’t dump him, remember?”
“Sorry, old habits and all that. It’s been a few years.”
I snorted and inhaled sharply. “Dumping Carter was never my plan, as I want to be with him for as long as he’ll have me. I’ll commute if need be. I’ll do whatever I need to do to make this work.”
“So what you’re saying is, it’ll be a weekend romance, for when it best suits you.”
It sounded so harsh, but there was a painful truth underlining it all. “It’s better than nothing, right?”
“Absolutely false, Cara. If you’re going to go all in, you need to be around for the nitty-gritty, not just a weekend of fun.”
Ouch.
“You need a job and a place to stayherebecause he isn’t moving to Red Deer. I need him here. It’s easier for me to keep an eye on him and ensure he’s doing okay.” She put her metaphorical foot down, but I’d never expected Carter to move. He had a life, a job, a home, and his family here.
“I’m working on acquiring both full-time employment and a permanent home. You need to believe that.”
“Well,” she didn’t sound like she did. “I can help with both. Temporarily, of course.”
