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“Alright.”
I sit back and smile, staring out the window. He knows what they’ll be like yet he’ll still put up with them for me.
I lose my smile when a thought occurs to me. “My fucking food,” I growl.
Ben grimaces. “Yeah, you won’t be seeing that again. I saw Maddox snag it when Hayden warned us about the litter guy. Don’t worry, I’ll stop at the next service station to get you food.”
“Thank you,” I breathe out.
Because my stomach is eating away at me, I’m that hungry.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Ben
Being back out on assignment, however minimal it is, is getting to me more than I let myself believe it would. I thought I’d be okay, that I was ready for this. But as I wait for the gates to open, there’s a pit of dread in my stomach. Imogen being with me isn’t helping. I wish I had dropped her off at the lodge they hired. Sabrina’s stalker might be inside awaiting his sentence, but he’s not the only person to stalk her. The actress has had to move three times this year because of crazy obsessed fans, men who want her, and twice because of the character she played in a TV drama. They took her acting and actions in the show literally, and one managed to attack her. What the new issue is, has been kept secret as Connor said it’s private, but he has assured me there was no immediate danger. Which is ridiculous since we’re taught everything is a possible danger.
“Are you okay?” Imogen asks as I pull up outside the large home. “You’ve been really quiet for a while now and you’ve not heard a word I’ve said.”
“Sorry. I’ve been thinking it might be a bad idea bringing you here.”
“Why? Do you think I’ll embarrass you?”
“What? No!” I reply. “Never. I just never factored in that my attention won’t be on the job I’m here to do if something happens. My first instinct will be to protect you.”
She lets out a soft sigh, gazing out the window to the house. “Ben, Dad wouldn’t have put you on a dangerous assignment. He assured me of that.”
“You asked him?”
“I did. He was worried about you coming.”
I grip the steering wheel tighter. “Does he not think I can do my job?”
“Not at all. It’s because you only went to two counselling sessions after your ordeal and the terms are you attend for two weeks.”
“I didn’t need them. She signed me off.”
“Are you sure? Because you’ve been tapping the steering wheel for twenty-five minutes and your leg has been bouncing every time we hit a red light. I think what happened has affected you more than you let on.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” I reply, then lower my gaze when it comes out harsher than intended. “I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve that.”
“No, I didn’t. But you are right. I don’t know what I’m talking about. I wasn’t there. But I can comment on what I’m observing and you aren’t as okay as you’re saying you are.”
I blow out a breath and sit back. “No, I’m not. I think I’ve lost confidence in my ability to do my job. I failed Cole and Emily, and as much as people have said otherwise, I can’t change how I feel.”
“Then don’t dwell on it. Instead, learn from it,” she whispers, taking my hand. “You might not have been the hero of their story but you weren’t the villain or the reason they got hurt. Emily came to Charlotte’s after seeing you in the hospital. She broke down, blaming herself for you being hurt. She said she owed everything to you. You might not have done as much as you wanted to that night, but what you did for her during their Halloween scare fest, and then with her family, is something she can never repay you for. You have no idea what it meant to her having you there.”
“I guess. Just promise me if anything happens, you’ll run. You’ll run until you get to safety.”
She snorts. “If something does happen, I’m not leaving you.”
I cup her jaw and tilt her head up until she meets my gaze. “I’m not saying this to be heroic or to make myself look good. I’m being dead serious. If anything happens or there’s a potential threat—whether it’s here or at home—and I tell you to run, you run. You will do more harm than good by staying. I’m not saying you can’t handle yourself, because we both know you can, but I cannot do what I need to and worry about you at the same time. You will get us both hurt.” I lower my hand to take hers. “My wellbeing and my life will mean nothing if I get you hurt. It’s something I’ll never be able to get over. So promise me you will run, or I will turn this car around and take you to the lodge. I mean it.”
Seeing how much this means to me, how much it will kill me if she gets hurt in my care, she squeezes my hand. “I promise I’ll run, Ben. I promise.”
I lean over the parking brake and pull her in for a kiss. As I pull back, I lean my forehead against hers. “Thank you.”
“Just one more thing,” she breathes.
