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“Infatuation is easy.”
“What’s the difference?”
“Lexi, you know infatuation.” I sit on my desk. I try to find my best sister-advice posture. But I don’t know what I’m doing here. Not anymore. “You fall for a different guy every two weeks.”
“Every week, thank you,” she says. “And I’ve been with Jake for six months.”
“Last weekend?”
“What about it?” she asks.
“Didn’t you go home with someone?”
“With Jake, obviously,” she says.
Obviously. She thinks everyone can see she’d rather go home with him than anyone else. That isn’t the Lexi from six months ago. That’s a Lexi who believes in commitment.
“But I couldn’t do it.” She shakes her head again. “It was too much pressure.”
“The sex?”
“No. The words. He said it, then. He said he loves me, and he respects what I want, even if I want to be on my own. But before that, he really wants to try being with me. Physically.”
She turned down sex?
“And I can’t do that… I can’t sleep with a guy who loves me when I don’t know if I love him. That’s a whole different thing!”
“You stopped because it was wrong?”
“Well, it wasn’t because I wasn’t in the mood. I was wet enough to drench the Sahara.”
“That is more information than I need.”
“Are you kidding, Dee? I’m horny twenty-four seven now!” She hides her face in her hands. “And I want him so much. I do. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted anyone this much.”
“So have him.”
Her voice softens. “What if there’s nothing there?” She looks at me, all concern and sincerity. “What if the only reason I keep showing up is because I want to jump his bones?”
“You’ve been dating for six months.”
“And it’s been exciting,” she says. “And different than with other guys. What if that’s all it is?”
“No one knows how they’re going to feel in the future.”
“You do,” she says. “You always know where you’re going.”
I shake my head. A few months ago, I would have agreed with her. A few months ago, I had a plan. Now? Not so much.
She comes to me because I’m wise, and I’m wise in certain places, but not here. Not when it comes to love. “What do you want?”
“I want you to come with us to Palm Springs.”
What?“I meant with him.”
“Keep Willa busy for me,” she says, undeterred. “I can show up for one dinner, as the perfect girlfriend, but I can’t do any more than that.”
“It’s not necessary,” I say. “Willa loves you.”
