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“I can’t … Alec. I don’t know what I was expecting tonight to be like. I thought …” I really didn’t have the words.
“Did I hurt you?” He seemed so confused and suddenly worried.
“No, but you will. I don’t want to be … I just. You were amazing, thank you.” I tried to untangle myself from him, but he wasn’t budging.
“I get it. ‘Let’s go to my place and fuck. Let’s be these two famous people flipping the world the bird.’ I see the depth in you, Kylie. You were never here to fuck. Explore the mystery of Alec Blair maybe … have fun definitely, be the you the world sees you as … perhaps. But at the end of the day, Kylie Morgan is a sweet woman with a traumatic past. She needs love, and this isn’t it.” His fingers stroked my hair.
The tears flowed again. How did he know me? The inside me that only my posse ever saw?
“I guess …” I couldn’t look at him.
“Okay. So … I want to love you tonight. I might not be able to carry that love much further because of my own stuff, but I want to give it to you tonight, and I don’t want you holding back either.” Was he scolding? Encouraging? Where was he going?
“That’s the problem … love. I don’t … can’t … shouldn’t … love you. I’m looking at your world and its open space covered in white and then I’m eating turkey off your skin. It’s weird and also dark and scary … and it blows my mind. I’m at the place where I should go home before I get annihilated.”
“Or you can stay, have ice cream, maybe a glass of wine, get in the Jacuzzi. We could go a couple more rounds; you will sleep by my side, naked and beautiful, and we wake up. I’ll go to work high on you, and you’ll go home and sleep more, hopefully, and wake up with these nice memories to erase some of the bad ones.” He made it all sound so perfect.
“Or I could go home and start recovering now …” I glared at him, finding some of my spark again.
“And miss all that fun? You’re not a stupid woman,” he teased and rolled off me and stood up from the bed.
God, he was gorgeous. He looked ravaged and yet his cock was starting to arc again, chubby and less intimidating when it wasn’t fiercely erect, it looked hopeful, I’d say, mustering up steam.
Chapter 8
Alec
That was some of the best sex I’d had in a very long time. Not because Kylie was so skilled, though she was incredibly responsive, which always got me hot, but because she was real. I usually dated women who were very focused on me. I, Alec Blair, was the goal. For Kylie, she wasn’t sure about me or what we were doing, and her vulnerability had me twisted in knots.
I was still on the fence as to whether this would be just one night. It definitely wouldn’t be much longer, but maybe. I gathered my pants off the floor and put them on without bothering to put on underwear. Truthfully, I didn’t need the pants either; they were more for Kylie’s comfort than mine.
Her questioning eyes beckoned what was I doing?
“Since you really didn’t eat an appropriate meal-sized portion of turkey, I’m pretty sure you have room for salted caramel ice cream.” I winked at her and walked from the bed to the kitchen.
I had intentionally designed my penthouse as one large space where there was no privacy because if it wasn’t just me here, then I’d be here with someone I was fucking, and nothing was sexier than doing everything in close proximity to the bed, or couch, or anywhere I’d want to have sex. The only places with little privacy were the bathrooms and the Jacuzzi on the glass-enclosed terrace. Like the rest of the house, the Jacuzzi was hidden behind tinted windows that had an excellent view of Manhattan but were completely private.
“I love salted caramel ice cream.” She perked up, though still looking rather ravaged from our last session.
“Great, meet me behind the wall.” She looked around the room, but there was exactly one wall in my penthouse.
She grabbed my shirt from the floor and traipsed over to the wall, looking a little wobbly on her feet. I couldn’t wait to have her, again and again, that night. I brought one big bowl of ice cream resting in a bucket of ice over to the Jacuzzi. This was going to be fun.
I found Kylie with her feet dangling in the water and her eyes in a far-off place. I wondered for a second what she might be thinking. I was almost tempted to sit and talk with her instead of following through with my plans, but I had ice and ice cream to play with, and I didn’t intend on wasting any of it.
