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I cut the ignition and stepped out of the car, stretching my legs for the first time in what felt like forever. I took a cursory look around, checking out my neighbors’ houses.
My two neighbors to the left and right of me were both home, their windows aglow with light.
The curtains were pulled tight, but I recognized the old truck of the middle-aged empty nesters who lived to the left. The wife had always been particularly interested in when we were going to start a family, offering babysitting if we ever needed it.
I really hoped she’d gained a bit more tact since then.
My neighbor on the right, the old lady who had a love for cats and baking, must have upgraded her late-model car because a shiny black SUV sat outside it, along with a sleek black truck.
Maybe she has family visiting?
Reaching back into the car, I grabbed my keys, which were still in the ignition, and my purse and made my way up the driveway.
Every step felt like a lead weight was attached to my heels.
Every step forward felt like a journey further into the past.
“Oh God, what was I thinking?” I breathed out as I stepped up to the door, my hand resting on the cool wood.
“It’s perfect!” I said, turning my head toward him.
“You’re going to paint that door, aren’t you?” He grinned.
“You know me so well.” I turned my head toward the boring black door. “What color? Blue? Green?”
“Whatever you want,” he told me. “This is your island fantasy. I’m just here for the ride.”
I let go of a shaky breath and unlocked the bright yellow door and took my first step over the threshold.
The air smelled stale and stagnant, and I could barely make out the plastic coverings that remained on the furniture in the dark.
“So much for, ‘No problem. We’ll take care of it,’” I muttered, as my eyes shifted around the room.
I could make out the familiar shadows of the sofa and the large chair in the living room.
I immediately felt both uncomfortable and at home, all at once. It was like someone had taken all my emotions and tossed them up in the air, and I was still waiting to see which one would land on the ground first.
I walked over to the light switch and said a silent prayer, hoping they’d at least done one right thing. I flipped the switch.
Nothing happened.
I tried again. Nada.
“Son of a bitch,” I said under my breath. I turned, unsure what to do, and the moment I did, my purse collided with the lamp on the small table. It fell with a thunderous crash, sending pieces of pottery flying all over the dusty wood floor.
I looked up to the heavens and tried counting to ten.
This is fine. Everything is fine.
I tried to ignore all the memories coming to the surface as I wandered through the dark house in search of a flashlight. I went to the kitchen first but came up empty-handed. And then I remembered Daniel used to keep one on his side of the bed, in case the power went out at night.
Which meant I had to go to the master bedroom.
Taking a deep breath, I headed down the hallway, placing a hand on the wall to help guide me. The small living room had been fairly easy to maneuver with moonlight streaming through the semi-sheer curtains, but the hallway was another story.
I felt like I was walking blind.
I found the first door on the left and entered. Not nearly as dark as the hallway, I was able to make out the shape of the bed and the dresser. There was no bedding. It had been stripped ages ago, and I took a moment to sit on the edge of the mattress, trying to remember the last time we had both been here.
