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Distantly, I feel a warmth on my cheek, but I think I’ve dissociated myself because I don’t notice Riot moving. I don’t register that he’s touched me until his lips press to mine.
I rear back and smack Riot across the cheek, which somehow breaks the spell of the past I’ve been stuck in. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
Riot rubs his thumb against his bottom lip, smearing a bead of blood that’s broken through. He chuckles under his breath and meets my gaze again.
“Why did you kiss me?”
“Because you were freaking out. Shaking. Damn near hyperventilating in my arms, and I couldn’t get you to come back from wherever you went.” The fear in his voice, the true terror I know too well to be fake, shocks me. “There were only two ways I could think of to free you from your mind, and I would never lay a hand on a woman.” Riot cups my cheek, and again, I let him touch me. “Are you all right?”
I say yes even though my voice cracks, and I’m still trembling.
“What do you need? Please tell me what you need, Khiara. What would make you feel safe?”
I swallow thickly and sniffle, not realizing I was still crying. “Is there a lock on the door?”
Riot’s hand falls, and his brows bunch together. “No, most doors around the castle don’t lock unless it’s one of the royal rooms. We place guards outside all the others.
“I don’t want any guards!” I say in a panic.
My door opens without warning. I grab the first thing I find, a bookend from the nightstand, and throw it without waiting to see who it is, and the person grunts. Riot puts his hand on my hip and pushes me behind him. He draws his sword and levels it at the opening door.
“What the hell is going on in here?” Bash asks, rubbing the spot on his head where I hit him.
“Sorry, sir.” Riot sheaths his sword and steps away from me. “Lady Khiara was attacked.”
Bash hurries forward and cups my cheeks. He turns my head to look at the two cuts Graves’s blade made on my neck and frowns. “I’ll kill them. Who was it?”
“Please don’t.” I want to be the one to drag a dagger through Graves’s heart. I earned that right with every drop of blood and every tear he’s stolen from me. “I’m fine.”
Bash clenches his teeth and looks over at Riot. “Who was it?”
Riot glances at me, and the hatred that usually colors his expression returns. A small part of me withers. He’s going to tell Bash the name of my attacker. I’m going to lose my vengeance.
Death is death. It shouldn’t matter who’s hand deals the final blow or what form it comes in. With another soldier, I wouldn’t care. With Graves, it has to come from me.
“I didn’t recognize him,” Riot says, and I’m shocked.
“Leave us,” Bash commands.
“Gladly.” Riot leaves without another word. I expected nothing less, but feel bad I can’t thank him for his help. Or apologize for smacking him.
Bash pulls me into a hug and runs his hands down my arms. I’m still shaking. I hadn’t realized it until now.
“I know you’re worried, but no harm will come to you. I promise.”
Bash doesn’t know anything, and he can’t make a promise like that, not with Graves and I under the same roof.
“I want a lock. Something that can only be opened with a key,” I tell him. “And a knife. The man… he took my knife.”
When he touched me.
My heart races at the memory of Graves’s skin on mine, and I feel it happening again. The invisible hand squeezing all rationality from my body. I know better than to let myself panic. Bad things happen when I’m not in control of my emotions, but I’m spiraling. I know I am. I just don’t know how to stop it.
Bash lifts his pants leg and unsheathes a small dagger holstered on his calf. He hands it to me, no questions asked, just as he had in the woods last night. “This might be too big to hide in that dress.”
His lips lift into a smirk and I let out a breathy laugh, releasing the tension I’ve been holding.
Bash looks around my room as if it’s the first time he’sseeing it. He walks to the open door near the window and pokes his head in. I recognize the motion.
