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“Bash…”
“Not another word.” He kisses the inside of my palm and holds it to his cheek for a heartbeat. “I won’t hear your goodbyes, but I will see you downstairs in an hour.”
Bash leaves before I can reject breakfast. He doesn’t know I don’t eat downstairs. How could he? The only time we’re together is at dinner and there are five—well, four—other girls vying for his attention. I would have preferred my quiet breakfast with Riot and then slipping out of the castle before Vidya could make me have our lesson this morning.
I close the door and Riot steps out of his hiding place. “You were raped?” he asks, his brows tight in thought.
“Let it go,” I say dismissively. I’ve talked about that night enoughalready. I want to put those memories back in a box and forget about everything related to Graves until after I’ve rescued Ezra.
I turn to the breakfast tray but Riot grabs my arm. His touch is gentle, but after bringing those memories to the surface, I can’t control the tremble that rips through me. Riot lets me go, shock stealing the color from his face. “It was the commander, wasn’t it? That’s why he looks at you that way. It’s why you didn’t want a guard outside your door.”
“Riot.” My throat tightens and I hug myself again. “Please. Just forget you heard that conversation.”
But he doesn’t. He pulls me into a hug, wrapping me tight in his arms. “Stars above, Khiara. No wonder you wanted to have a say in what happened last night.” His voice trails off as he says, “And you chose me. Why?”
I shrug. “My magic likes you. I figured, if it trusted you with our secret, I could trust you with my body.”
“Oh, princess.” The empathy and compassion rolling off him is enough to bring me to my knees. I rest my head on his chest and listen to the steady thrum of his heart until the wave of tears, which I don’t want him to see, passes.
“I need to get ready,” I say, pulling back. “You should go.”
Riot nods but lingers close. “Do you need anything for our trip? Bash took care of the logistical needs, but what’s your plan?”
My plan. Right. The one part of this trip I wasn’t ready for. I chew on my bottom lip and try to piece together what I need. I’ve had one day with Mom’s book. Not nearly enough time but at least I’m only flying half-blind into today. “Can you grab me a pumice bowl and some herbs?”
“Make a list and I’ll see what I can do.”
I use the pen and paper on my nightstand to write down every detoxing herb I can remember. “All of these are in the atrium. I can help you after breakfast but if you can get as many as you can durring, it would be great.”
Riot reads over the list. “I know them all. Don’t leave the dining hall until I get there. I’ll have Sasha walk you downstairs.”
“How do you know which herbs are which?”
Riot smirks. He leans down and kisses me briefly. “Ichanged my mind. I think I’m going to steal every kiss I can until you leave me. You good with that, princess?”
My cheeks burn bright again and I nod. Butterflies fill my chest as he walks out the door. This man is something else. An unexpected complication. Someone I might have trouble saying goodbye to.
“You didn’t drink the wine,” Jinx says, slithering into the seat beside me.
“Huh?” I ask, distracted.
Breakfast is dragging, even with Bash’s unexpected visit. He’s never joined us before and his being here has Raven, Tamia, and Tori fawning over him. Raven and Tamia sit as close to Bash as their chairs allow while Tori hovers behind him, her fingers working knots out of his shoulders. He should be eating but instead, his gaze has fixated on me. Every bite I pretend to eat. Every shift of my eyes toward the hallway. He sees it all.
“The wine,” Jinx says, drawing my gaze back to her as she slides a glass of red toward me. “It’s to die for. You really should try it.”
“Oh, thanks but I’m good.” I glance at the hallway again, anxiously waiting for Riot to show up. I didn’t ask for much, six herbs since I already have the crabapple blooms. My leg bounces as I twist my fork between my fingers. Why is he taking so long?
“Jinx,” Bash barks from across the room, his tone commanding but not rough enough to scare the other ladies away. If they have a problem with how Bash spoke to Jinx, they don’t show it. “Leave her be. If she doesn’t want the wine, then she doesn’t want it.”
I throw Bash an appreciative smile. I’m not in the headspace to drink. I still don’t trust anything I can’t see being made or that Riot hasn’t brought, but I also need a clear head today. As much as I’d like a drink to calm my nerves, now is not the time.
Jinx kicks her chair back and storms out of the room. The glass of red wine forgotten.
“Ladies.” Bash scoots his chair back as breakfast wraps up. The girls circling him shift to match his movements, looking at him doe-eyed and smitten. “Now that you seem to be finished eating, I’d like to have a private moment with Lady Khiara.”
There’s a murmured sound of disappointment that I’ve been chosen again to spend time with Bash. Raven glares at me as she walks by, her distaste for my favoritism evident.
“You seem distracted,” Bash says, coming around the table. He sits on the edge, precariously close, and circles one of my curls around his finger.
