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He took another step forward. “Jocelyn—”
“I know. Not exactly how you imagined your day would play out, right?” Years of practice had to be worth something. She swiped at her face, but getting rid of the physical evidence of her hurt wasn’t enough. It’d never been enough. Turning to the mirror, she plastered that smile on her face. There. That was better. She could just make him out through the last layer of tears in her eyes. “First a bombing at your station, then a mercenary crying in front of you over her dead husband. Maybe next you’ll get food poisoning from the dinner I put together. Wouldn’t that be the icing on the cake?”
She had to get moving. Jocelyn grabbed for the first aid kit under the sink and started wrapping the blisters she’d broken open. Staying put gave the bad thoughts a chance to sneak in. They should’ve heard from Albuquerque’s bomb squad by now. She had to finish those cookies for Elena and Cash, too. She should—
“Jocelyn, look at me.” Baker’s voice brought the downward cycle of to-do lists to a halt. He said her name as though it were the most beautiful word in his world, as though right then he saw who she really was. Not a mercenary. Not Carville. Just Jocelyn. Something behind her rib cage convinced her that he could fix everything with that single shift between them, but that wasn’t how the world worked. Howgriefworked. No amount of pity was going to change the past.
But she still found herself locking her gaze on his.
Baker offered her his hand, palm up. Inviting. “I want to show you something.”
He was giving her a choice to be touched, and appreciation nearly outpaced a rush of possibilities that crashed through her. She’d spent every day since getting the news that Miles hadn’t survived his disease learning new languages, recipes, combat techniques and dozens of other experiences, but she couldn’t imagine what a small-town police chief would want to show her.
She slipped her hand into his. His skin was bruised, cut, scabbing, harsher than she’d expected. But real. Baker dragged her free of the bathroom and toward the wall-to-ceiling window on the other side of her room. From here she could just make out Alpine Valley with the west end of the town peeking out from the canyon guarding it on both sides. An oasis in the middle of the New Mexican desert.
“You see that collection of buildings out there?” Radiant heat bled through the tinted panes of glass, but it was nothing compared to the warmth spreading through her hand. “Just outside of the canyon mouth?”
She focused everything she had on finding what he wanted her to see. Her heart pounded double-time in expectation of a full-blown breakdown as sadness worked through her, but the fear that usually rode on its coattails never came. As though their physical connection was holding her steady. “I see a barn, maybe a house. Though I’m not sure who lives there.”
“I do.” The window tint wasn’t enough to block the sunset from highlighting all the small changes in his expression. “The barn, the house, the land. Three acres.”
“So you’re not as homeless as you led me to believe earlier?” She tried to make out the property lines to mentally gauge Baker’s private kingdom, but there didn’t seem to be anything but dirt and emptiness surrounding the structures. Dread pooled in her gut. “Why have you been crashing at the station for the past few months?”
“My sister and I had big plans to move out west and buy up land here in New Mexico. We were going to raise horses and start a bed and breakfast.” He stared out at the land, not really here with her. “Took us a lot longer than it should have, but neither of us had built anything in our lives. We had to learn as we went. And buying up horses?” A scoff released the pressure of the moment. “Man, we were suckered into paying more than we should have, but we didn’t care. We just wanted a place that was our own. Away from the chaos of the city. Somewhere we could hear ourselves think.”
Why was he telling her this? “The two of you must be close.”
“We were. Spent every second of our days together. Well, almost. There were times we got on each other’s nerves because we were overheated, sunburned and hungry from working the land all day, but we’d still sit down to dinner every night as though nothing had happened.” His grip tightened around her hand. “The last time I saw her was during one of those stupid arguments. I don’t even remember what I was so mad about. Guess it doesn’t matter now, though.”
Her mouth dried. “The last time you saw her?”
“About two weeks into getting the place off the ground, the cartel came calling. Talking some BS about how they owned the land we built on.” Baker shifted his weight between both feet, his attention still out the window. She recognized the agitation for what it was: an attempt to distract himself. “Come to find out they’d set up one of their delivery routes straight through the property and weren’t too keen on the idea someone had moved in on their territory. But we weren’t just going to get up and leave.”
“What happened?” In truth, she already knew the answer. Knew this story—like her own—didn’t have a happy ending. How could it?
Baker locked that penetrating gaze on hers. “They burned everything we built to the ground. And took my sister right along with it.”
HEHADN’TTOLDanyone about Linley before.
Not even his own deputies, but he didn’t trust them anyway. Not after discovering one of his own had been working for the very people Baker despised. Of course, there’d been rumors. Questions as to why an outsider like him would want to suddenly apply for the position of chief of police. They hadn’t trusted him. Still didn’t. Not really. But he’d live up to his promise to protect the people of Alpine Valley. Especially from cartels like the one that had destroyed his life.
Baker memorized the rise and fall of the landscape as they shot across the desert inside Jocelyn’s SUV. Surrounded by miles of desert, Alpine Valley had provided life to an entire nature preserve. Trees over a hundred feet tall crowded in around the borders and protected the natural hot springs and centuries-old pueblos tucked into the canyons. It was beautiful. Not in the same way he’d loved the leaves in the fall back east or watched snow pile up outside in his parents’ backyard. There was honestly nothing but cracked earth, weeds and cacti as far as the eye could see.
But it was home now.
What had Linley called it? An oasis to forget their problems. If only that had been true.
“We need a plan.” Baker turned his attention back to the file on his lap—the bombing outside of Ponderosa. Jocelyn had gone the extra mile to call in a favor from their department there, giving them full access to the case. They could dance around the present all they wanted with dark personal confessions and frank observations, but it wasn’t going to change the fact that a bomb—most likely linked to the cartel—had been left in his station. Just as one had been left for the Ponderosa chief to find. “Albuquerque’s bomb squad isn’t going to like us just showing up on scene. There are protocols to follow so we don’t disturb the evidence.”
“It’s all taken care of.” Her hand—ringless, he couldn’t help but notice—kept a light grip on the steering wheel as she maneuvered them along the familiar street lined with flat-roofed homes, rock landscaping and a few porch lights.
“What do you mean?” he asked.
Jocelyn didn’t answer as she pulled into the parking lot that used to hold a much larger police station than what was left behind. Crime scene tape cut off access to approaching vehicles, but his cruiser was still parked outside the makeshift perimeter. She pulled the SUV beside it.
He’d reached out to his deputies to give them the rundown of what’d happened. It didn’t matter that their station was sporting a sunroof nobody had wanted. Alpine Valley PD didn’t get to take a vacation from answering calls. Though now his remaining two deputies would be answering and responding to calls for the foreseeable future from the town rec center. Good a place as any.
“Looks like the courts are barred from working out of their half of the building,” he said.
