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Now I just have to explain that to Eliot.
eighteen
OWEN
I’ve never gottenpast my heart speeding up to the point of leaping from my ribcage when I see her. This is no exception.
Reed told me I needed to park near the bottom and hike up the hill to reach the cliffs. I did as he instructed, and now I’m slightly winded standing behind her. Not close enough that I’ll scare her but so I can watch her hair play in the breeze.
“You know it’s impossible for you to sneak up behind me, right?” she says without turning around.
“Why’s that?”
“Because the very air changes when you’re near.” My heart double thuds in my chest. I rub on it to try and calm it down to no avail. It’s not mine anymore anyway; it belongs to her.
“Can I sit down?” I ask.
“Last time I heard, my name is not on the abstracts for this property.”
I try to hide my smile as I sit next to her with my feet dangling over the edge. We sit in silence looking at the river rolling away while I try to organize my thoughts. There are a million things I want to say to her. A million I should say. But everything feels like a jumbled mess inside my brain, so I do the only thing I can. I just begin.
“My sister, Gwyn, grew up in the same home I did. It was full of love, support, and acceptance. Our parents are good, hard-working people. But Gwyn always had a wild streak. At fourteen, that translated into a drug habit.”
“Owen. You don’t have to—” she says, turning to face me.
“Yeah, I do.”
She quiets but remains facing me.
“The first we knew she was pregnant with Tessa was when they called me from the hospital that she was in labor. She had moved out of my parents’ house already. I would see her occasionally hanging out with her shady friends.”
Eliot takes my hand and squeezes. My mind immediately settles.
“Gwyn disappeared from the hospital, so I brought Tessa home,” I continue. “Actually, I took her to Mom and Dad’s where I had help. My sister showed back up right before she turned one and whisked her off. That was the first time she took Tessa without warning. She’s done it off and on for the last twelve years.
“The last time she pulled her out of school and disappeared, I knew I needed to start again somewhere new. I couldn’t just wait to see if she showed up again. I needed a break from my life.”
“That’s why you took the job in Dansboro Crossing?” Eliot asks.
“Sheriff Rogers met my dad at some conference. Dad put in a call. I think both of my parents knew I needed to get away. It never occurred to me that Tessa would be dumped on my doorstep a thousand miles from home. But this time, Gwyn isn’t taking her again. I’ve been trying to negotiate the red tape to legally adopt her, so she has a steady home from now on.”
“Do you think they’ll approve the adoption?”
“I’m hopeful. But that’s not what worries me. What worries me is that, by not including you in everything that’s been happening, I might have lost you.” I turn my body so I’m facing her. Taking her other hand, I go for broke.
“Eliot, I’m sorry. I never meant to shut you out. I’m an idiot, but I hope you can look past that because I’ve fallen in love with you. The idea that I screwed up enough to drive you away is eating me up inside.”
“You love me?” she asks, gazing back at me with her warm, whiskey-colored eyes.
“I do. I think it happened when I wasn’t paying attention. It just kind of snuck up on me. I’m glad it did though. I can’t think of any other woman I’d rather be with than you. Do you think I still have a shot?”
“Hmm,” she says, tapping her chin. “Let me think. Do I really want to be with a man who is sexier than his name suggests, goes above and beyond to care for his family,andprofesses his adoration in one of the most romantic settings in this county?”
“Owen’s a sexy name. Grandpa was a total sex machine.” I smile. Of course, she’s being her sassy self. It’s my first indication I might be forgiven.
“No,” she says, placing a hand over my mouth. “No one’s grandpa is a sex machine. But, Owen, you never lost me. I never went anywhere, and I know you’ve been drowning. I’m pissed at myself for not helping you. I guess we’re both just trying to figure out where we go from here.”
“Just taking the time to let Tessa invade your work has been huge. For both of us. Do you think you can handle being with someone with so much baggage?”
