Page 67 of It Kills Me


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You’re fucking beautiful. His deep voice played in my head, serious but with a hint of playfulness.

I continued to stare at myself, the smoky eye makeup on my lids, my lips painted a dark red. I didn’t mind my appearance, but I didn’t know how it earned his obsession. He made me feel like the only woman in the world, and we weren’t even serious. Men hit on me left and right, I got catcalled down the street, and I knew I had something to offer. But no man had offered anything of value.

The bathroom became crowded, so I returned to the balcony.

My father was on the phone, slipping right back into work the second he had the opportunity. “Just get it done.” He finished the call then slid his phone back into his pocket.

“Work never sleeps, huh?”

“And neither do I. Are you enjoying the show so far?”

“I always love the opera.”

He sat with his legs crossed, and he sipped his glass of wine as he looked at the audience below. Everyone was up, hitting the restrooms or getting a drink at the bar. The beautiful music was interrupted by a cacophony of conversation.

“You sounded angry.”

“It’s the only way to get stuff done.” His mood was totally different now. He was back to his coldness, looking out at the audience instead of at me. This would be the time when he would ask me about my life, when he would tell me an interesting story or something he’d learned about art. But it was as if he didn’t want to be there.

“If you need to take care of something at work, I understand.”

“I don’t need to take care of anything.”

“Then why is your mood so foul?” I blurted.

He gave a slow breath, his chest rising with the inflation. “Axel is a thorn in my side.” Now his voice was quiet, packed with silent rage.

I felt a lot of things all at once. Terror. Disappointment. Discomfort. I swallowed and did my best to keep a straight face even though my father didn’t look at me. “Why?”

There was a long pause. A really long one.

So long, it made me wonder if he knew…about us.

Then he turned to look at me. “Because I don’t like him.” The warmth and affection in his eyes were long gone. He stared at me like he expected me to say something, like I should know exactly why he felt that way.

“I work on the numbers every day, and I already see an improvement since the last time we spoke. He did as you asked and lowered costs and got the profits where you wanted them to be. I don’t understand the problem.” The more time I spent with both men, the more I recognized the differences in their styles. My father exerted his authority, but Axel didn’t need to make the same effort. It was obvious his men viewed him as a friend, not a boss.

He stared for several seconds, blinking rarely. “But I know who he really is.”

I had no idea what that was supposed to mean. “If you’re unhappy with him, then let him go. Find someone else.” The prospect of them ending their business relationship actually gave me a jolt of excitement, because then we wouldn’t have to be a secret. We could be something more…if we wanted.

That seemed to make my father angrier. “We made a deal, and he needs to keep his word.”

My father was always clear and eloquent, but he was making little sense right now. “And he is keeping his word, by getting the profits up like you asked.”

He gave an annoyed sigh.

“You aren’t making sense, Dad.”

“Everyone I’m associated with is guilty of something. We’re all criminals. We’re all above the law. But there are certain criminals I can’t tolerate, and he’s one of them. I didn’t realize the truth until after I’d already hired him, and now I’m stuck with a man I don’t respect.”

My heart started to pound harder, turning into a drum when it’d been butterfly wings just a second ago. I kept my face slack, tried to force an annoyed expression so it wouldn’t be obvious that I cared. “What truth?” I asked. “What could he have possibly done to bother you so much?” Now I had to sit there and act like I didn’t really care whether he answered or not. But fuck, that was hard to do.

My father stared me down, his expression livid. “He served a two-year sentence in prison for assault and rape.”

There was no way I could keep a straight face now. My face tightened in shock, and I felt my insides grow tangled. “What…?”

“He should have served ten years, but he paid his way out of his sentence.”

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