Page 74 of It Kills Me


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I nodded. “She believed me.”

“No fucking way.”

“I didn’t have to convince her. She said it didn’t seem like something I would do.” There were no words to describe how much that meant to me. That there was someone in my life who really saw me, who didn’t believe all the lies and actually let me speak the truth. “You know how fucking nice that was?” I hadn’t tried to be in a relationship since my divorce, but I knew if things got too serious with anyone, they would figure out my secret and take off. So I never really bothered. But then I saw Scarlett, and I was hooked. I’d never intended to get remarried anyway, not after the bullshit I went through, but it was nice to know it was an option. “This woman…is making me feel some shit.”

“I need to see this girl.”

I had pictures of her on my phone, but I would never share.

“You do realize that Dante will always be a problem, right?”

“Don’t remind me.”

“Just kill him.”

“Yes, that will go over great with Scarlett.”

“She doesn’t have to know it’s you.”

I shook my head. “I wouldn’t betray her like that. And I know she would be heartbroken if she lost him. I don’t ever want her to be heartbroken.” There was no real way I could be with Scarlett, even if her father and I parted ways. My past was my future, and he’d specifically told me to stay away from her and I’d ignored that request. There was no way it would ever work, which was a shame, because holy fuck, did I like this woman.

“You want my advice?”

“Not really.”

“You know you do.” He put the cigar back in his mouth.

“I hate your advice.”

“Because you know it’s right and you don’t want to hear it.” He released the smoke through his mouth. “There’s no scenario where this works out. So don’t waste your time on it. Sneaking around with her, hanging out at strip clubs, pretending to be somewhere you aren’t…it’ll never go anywhere.”

I stared at the floor.

“If you get your kicks from fucking your enemy’s daughter, then keep doing it?—”

“It’s not like that.”

“I’m just saying, if it doesn’t mean anything to you anyway, then no harm done. But if it does mean something to you, it’s gonna punch you in the gut…or get you killed. No woman is worth that. It’ll be worse than your divorce.”

I released a painful chuckle. “My marriage was never as good as this.”

He studied me, the cigar held between his fingertips. “End it, Axel. You’re already balls deep in this woman. You don’t want to get any deeper.”

My parents couldn’t tolerate a one-on-one interaction, so whenever we met to discuss our business ventures, it was always in the presence of lawyers, and sometimes even security.

Like that would stop me.

They lived outside Florence in the countryside, having a sprawling estate covered in olive trees. The land had been in my family for generations, so we’d been in the olive oil business for hundreds of years. The land continued to be fertile for us, the olive trees still producing after all this time.

The place used to be special to me, my childhood, but now the air was heavy with resentment. I passed through the gates and then approached the magnificent double doors before I was ushered inside. They were seated on the patio, and I crossed the expansive room as I walked toward the back of the house. There were pictures on the way, my parents on their wedding day, pictures of their travels, pictures with their friends…

I was nowhere in sight.

It was as if they’d never had me.

I stepped outside, both of them sitting at the table under the umbrella with a lawyer on either side. There was a lone chair across the table—reserved just for me. “Beautiful day, huh?” I took my seat and looked at the two of them.

They ignored what I said.

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