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She froze, and then finally laughed, the sound fake and wrong in my ears. “It’s a little early to talk about something like that,” she finally said.
I frowned, wondering how much I should push this issue. Shewasabout to move to Dallas. It would be nice if she was happy about it.
“What’s early? I’m in. You’re in. We’re good to go,” I pressed.
She glanced up at me with wary eyes. “Why are you pushing this? What’s the rush?”
“I have to leave soon for Dallas. I’d like for you to come with me,” I answered quietly.
She sighed, and I hated the sound of it. “I’m sorry. I can’t—I can’t rush this thing between us. I have too much to lose.”
I understood what she was saying. But it didn’t mean that I had to accept it.
“Olivia—”
“Don’t,” she sprung out of my arms and turned to face me, the soft flicker of the television playing across her beautiful features. “You don’t understand. I’m amess. Every day I’m just holding it together. You’ve seen me at my best, believe it or not, and what’s happened between us? A couple of panic attacks…lots of crying. That’s just the beginning.”
I opened my mouth to tell her I didn’t care about that, that I was there for her no matter what.
But she shook her head ferociously.
“I had to distract myself for hours today because I wanted those pills. The same pills that I took every day foryears. Thesame ones that made me an idiot, and let them take everything from me little by little because I was so high.” Olivia shook her head and my chestachedseeing how much she hated herself. She stood up. “I can’t jump headfirst into something with you, Walker. Even if you seem like ‘Prince Charming’. Even if you seem like the best fucking thing that’s ever happened to me. Moving to Dallas is definitely jumping in headfirst,” she ended quietly.
“Come here,” I growled, watching her lower lip tremble.
“Why?” she whispered.
“Comehere,” I pressed again, and this time she practically threw herself into my arms, burying her face in my neck, her whole body shaking.
Oh sweetheart, I’m going to take care of everything, I vowed silently.
No matter what it took.
Olivia
“I’d like to think there is a place for us, all the people that walk around perpetually empty, with something missing inside of them. Somewhere where we can belong, and exist without this…pain,” I murmured against his skin as he held me through yet another one of my meltdowns.
He gently lifted me off his chest, his stare burning into my tear stained gaze. “There is a place,” he told me fiercely, making me want to die with the devotion in his eyes. “I was put on this earth to bethatplace. To be those missing pieces.”
I just continued to look at him. I wanted to believe him. But every person I’d ever met had only made those missing pieces bigger.
I’dliketo think that place actually exists.
But I don’t tell him that I don’t.
“I want to be wrapped in your skin…in your bones. I want every piece of you, all over me. There isn’t anything about you that I don’t want. That I don’t covet,” he whispered. “There’s nothing you could show me that’s going to make me change my mind.”
“Change your mind?”
“That you’re mine. Your body belongs to me. Your heart belongs to me. Your soul. Is. Mine.”
He kissed me like he owned me.
And as I settled back into his chest…I was a little afraid that he did.
CHAPTER 20
OLIVIA
