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“You still want me to move to Dallas?” I asked hesitantly, nervous excitement building inside me.
“Are you serious?” he growled. “Because this isn’t a funny joke, baby.”
“I’m serious. I’m moving to Dallas.”
“I’ll make sure you don’t regret it,” he swore.
“This is me diving in headfirst,” I whispered, and I could hear his answering sigh of relief like it was a physical caress.
“I’m diving right in there with you.”
Walker
I watched Olivia sleep, marveling at her perfection, counting the freckles on her olive skin, tracing her lips with my gaze….falling more and more into obsession.
She looked so peaceful right now, all the sadness and anxiety bled out of her.
But that peace would disappear when she woke up. I knew that for a fact.
There was a storm inside of her, and although she may have sounded excited about moving today, I knew that her mood could change with the wind.
I’d held her last night, saw the misery in her eyes, the hesitation…the lack of belief in me…in us.
I’d said this before, but it was more true than ever. She was a flight risk, always on the edge of running away.
It hadn’t been a long time, the rational part of my brain was well aware of that…but there was a part of me that wasn’t sure she’d ever be able to trust.
Sometimes broken things stayed broken no matter what you did.
My mom was proof of that.
I wasn’t prone to panic, but there was nothing that got me closer to the edge than imagining her leaving me.
As I lay there beside her, my resolve settled in my chest.
It wasn't enough for her to move.
It wasn’t even enough for her to move in withme.
It wouldn’t even be enough for me to get her to marry me.
I needed to tie her to me forever…and there was only one real way to do that.
I slipped out of bed, careful not to wake her up. Making my way to the bathroom, my steps were silent against the cool tile floor. The small package of birth control pills sat on the counter—she kept it out so she never forgot to take it.
I stared at the packet for a long moment, knowing this was way different than poking a few holes in a condom.
I reached for the pills with a steady hand though, carefully replacing the contents with sugar pills I’d gotten online, the act feeling completely exhilarating. I needed to research how long it took for birth control to wear off.
Looks like there was going to be a new “Daddy” in the Circle of Trust.
And it wasnotLincoln Daniels.
I made sure to put the packet back exactly where she’d had it, a sense of satisfaction washing over me. Satisfaction and peace.
A snort slipped out of me and I wondered if I’d actually gone mad.
Because I was totally pulling the goalie so to speak.
