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Are you okay?
What the? Oh no. My heart falls into my feet when I see the text message that I sent.
Me:
Hi, my name is Maren and I’m your dad you motherfucker! Are you trying to kill us both you dumb son of a bitch? I swear to god. Fuck.
Frantic, I type my reply.
Me:
I’m so sorry! It was a voice to text message and someone pulled out in front of me. That was not meant for you.
Customer:
Are you certain? You sure sound like my dad.
Me:
I’m assuming it autocorrected “damn.” Sorry again.
If he reports me, I’ll get banned from the app and be limited to the grocery delivery option which is more time consuming and less lucrative.
Customer:
Too bad. Can I still call you dad?
A grin inches onto my face as the light changes, and I risk another voice-to-text message. Thank goodness, it doesn’t look like they’re going to be a jerk about it.
Me:
Absolutely. I’m on my way, sport.
The delivery is for a local motel and the door to the room opens when I park in front of it. Holy shit. I’m pretty sure I can’t be this guy’s relative in any capacity considering my vagina just stood at full attention. Of all people to embarrass myself in front of, I picked this dark headed muscled god of construction workers. At least that’s my guess at his occupation, judging by the pickup truck with a bed full of equipment and supplies parked nearby.
He leans against the doorway and his biceps make a nice muscly appearance when he crosses his arms. The grin on his face makes heat climb up my neck. I’m not sure if he caught me ogling him or if it’s in response to my texting disaster.
“Papa,” he says, nodding.
“Hey there, champ. Here’s your lunch.” His smile widens when I hand over the bag and drinks. “Thanks for not reporting me.”
Another guy steps into view just inside the door. “You made our day,” he says, laughing as he takes one of the drinks then disappears inside.
He isn’t bad looking either but nowhere near the level of sexy that’s now running his gaze over me.
No. Nope. Absolutely not. I’m on a dating hiatus for a reason. It’s time to go. My brain freezes up as nerves kick in, and I retreat to my car, babbling, “Okay, remember to wash your belly button and don’t eat the yellow snow.”
A brief glance is all I get at the perplexed expression on sexy guy’s face when I back my car out. He must think I’m crazy. Why did I say that? I was trying to think of something witty a dad would say to his son and that’s what came out. Damn Pops and his ridiculous sayings.
By the time I pull into the parking lot of another restaurant for a pickup, I see they left me a five-star rating and the largest tip I’ve ever gotten. Oh well, a little embarrassment was worth it at least. God, he was hot.
Too bad I’m avoiding dating and relationships right now because he had that look about him. You know the one. It shows in the way they carry themselves and that look in their eyes. He was the type to pin you to the mattress and fuck your brains out for hours. My type, in other words. Unfortunately, those men are usually accompanied by a horrible personality and not much going for them otherwise. It may have taken my friends pointing out to me that I date too many losers, but at least I’m aware of the problem now. So, I’ve been spending some time alone to consider what needs to change. Like maybe shooting for a different type of man who has his shit together instead of another hot scumbag.
The rest of my deliveries are uneventful. After such a good tip day, a chocolate shake is in order, so I swing through a drive-thru to get one for me and a strawberry shake for Pops. As I drive across the parking lot, a familiar furry face runs after my car.
“What are you doing out here, you dummy?” I ask, as if my neighbor’s unhinged dog, Twister—Twist for short—might actually answer. Once my door is open, he wastes no time bounding across my lap, leaving dirty paw prints on my pants. He plants his fuzzy butt in the passenger seat and looks at me with a half eaten hamburger in his mouth.
I point at him. “Just eat your nasty parking lot garbage and leave the shakes alone.” He obliges, scarfing the burger then lying down in the seat while I take him home.
