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I press my fingers to my lips, to try to stop them from tingling.
That was so close, too close. Without another thought, I turn and run to my room, locking the door after me and sinking down to the floor, adrenaline coursing through my whole body.
25
Mason
“Is there anything else, your grace?” The air steward asks me, his suit neat and sharply pressed. It’s barely seen service in the last few years; it looks brand new. There’s a whiskey on the table between me and the seats facing mine and a plate of cookies with an abandoned teacup belonging to my wayward child.
We’re almost landing in Tahoe, and I’ve hardly touched my whiskey. I shake my head and look back to my newspaper. On the floor, across the aisle in the second grouping of seats, my daughter sits and plays with her toy horses while Eva watches closely.
She seems to have gotten used to the jet’s movements. I didn’t think to ask for a nanny that handles international or flight travel well. I travel so infrequently now that I’m older that there didn’t seem to be much point.
I clear my throat, and Eva lifts her head, gaze narrowing in on me immediately.
“We’ll be landing in a few minutes,” I tell her, folding my paper with a sigh. She nods and gets to her knees.
“Let’s tidy up, my lady,” she says to Madeline, helping my daughter put her horses away in their bag, a blue leather duffle stamped with our family’s crest all over. Maddie yawns and climbs into the seat next to me, and I lean over to buckle her in, fastening her small body into safety. She closes her eyes, and Eva relaxes into her own seat, her gaze on Maddie for any hint, any sign of discomfort or need. Warmth flares in my chest. There felt something proprietary in how I watch the two of them, protective even. I’d never seen my duchess treat Madeline with anything other than thinly veiled contempt. And Madeline was her child. Unfamiliar feelings lurk under my breast bone at the sight of Eva, treating a child not even her own, like spun sugar.
Our plane hits the ground with a barely perceptible bump, and Eva is leading Maddie down the stairs to the outside. Crisp air, the hint of mountain hanging in it, fills my lungs, and the sun glints off their identical brown heads, Maddie glancing up at Eva.
From behind, the nanny has straight shoulders, her carriage excellent for a commoner, almost as if…
She could almost be…
I stumble over the last stair as she turns to me, her profile lit up by the early morning sun, along the slope of her nose and the plane of her cheeks. Her mouth drops open and she takes a step, then a second, her hand grabbing mine to steady me.
Heat explodes in my hand, up my arm, as her fingers close around mine. Air goes still around us, her face so close to mine.
“Are you alright, your grace?” She asks, her voice muffled and distant. All I can see is her eyes, bright and near.
I’m cursed by these feelings, the way she draws me in like the north star. Most days I curse that I was even born. Now, the scent of her perfume, lilacs and tobacco blossom, I wish I was anything but a duke.
Anyone at all, someone who could have a woman like her. A woman so strong, beautiful,common. Entirely unsuitable for me, even less so to be the parent figure for my daughter and future children. And yet, here she is. The only thing about her that is remotely unacceptable is the circumstances of her birth and place in life.
And that… that is… a problem that is surmountable.
“Your grace?” Her eyes search my face, worried, and Maddie giggles.
“Daddy, are you stuck?” She asks, and I drop Eva’s hand, clearing my throat.
“Thank you,” I can’t keep the gruffness out of my voice.
Our bags are brought out, the stewards hurrying to the limo waiting on the tarmac, the crew of the plane lined up along the red carpet that spills toward our ride. They stand at attention, wallpaper against the backdrop of the open sky, and Maddie clings tight to Eva, hand in hand.
“Your grace,” my Tahoe driver greets me, holding the door open.
“Ladies first,” I murmur and turn to Eva who is a step behind me with Maddie. Her eyes meet mine, and I swear there is the faintest pink of a blush across her cheekbones as she ducks her head and climbs inside, Maddie throwing herself in after with an excited squeal.
“I want to go swimming as soon as we get there,” she’s saying to Eva, eyes wide as she bounces on the seat. The limo pulls away from the plane, the crew in stiff salute as we go. I sigh and pick up my phone. There’s probably emails and notifications piling up…
“You have a pool at home,” Eva replies to her, “why are you so excited to swim in the lake?”
“It’snotthe same,” Maddie sniffs, nose in the air as she looks out the window, but her eyes gleam with greed for the day ahead, and Eva catches my eye, a laughing smile on her face despite or maybe because of my daughter’s water snobbery.
Emails have flooded my inbox, and I can feel a dull headache in the base of my neck starting up. I’m going to have to go right into my office as soon as we get to the lake house—
Regret wells up inside me as I glance at my daughter. I wanted to spend time with her. This trip had multiple purposes, but putting away work and actually getting to live a life as a father for a few days was one of them.
