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I know if we can get Lennon to our place, even for a little while, then we can get her to stay. I’m just speeding the process along.
At least that’s how I’m justifying it knowing full well she’s going to be beyond pissed when she finds out. I won’t lie to her if she questions me about it. Hell, more than likely I’ll fess up to the whole thing.
When Lennon comes tearing into my office without knocking, I force myself to keep my face neutral. The look of panic on her face has my heart sinking and I instantly regret my actions. I shouldn’t have done this.
“I just got a call from my building manager. They’re tenting the building immediately. He said something about emergency fumigation,” she rambles, her eyes welling up in tears.
Fuck.
I stand up and close the distance between us, pulling her into my chest and holding her. I have never in my life experienced this level of wishing I could go back and make a different decision. Her body is shaking against mine and it’s breaking my fucking heart.
Why didn’t I just ask her to move in?
Because you were afraid that she would turn you down and tell you that you’re moving too fast.
Yeah. But now look at her. I should have slowed down. Or, at the very least, I should have run my half-cocked plan past my brothers. They would have shut it down so fast, but I didn’t. Now, here I am with our woman in my arms as she’s freaking out.
“I need to go over there and grab my stuff before they tent it and I can’t get in for,” she pauses and takes a steadying breath, “I’m not even sure how long. I stopped listening after he said tenting and fumigation.”
“It’s okay.” I run a hand down her back. “There’s no reason to be this upset. We’ll go and get your stuff. It’ll be okay. You’ll see. Our building is old,” I start, about to tell her it was due for some kind of major work or upkeep like this.
Before I can, she jerks out of my hold and looks up at me, there are no longer tears in her eyes. Now there is only righteous anger. “What do you mean ‘our’ building? As in the business’ building?”
“No.” Like I said, I won’t lie to her face. “I mean ‘our’ as in my brothers and I own the building.”
I hang my head in shame, unable to watch the emotions flit across Lennon’s face.
There’s a bite to her words, “What did you do, Lachlan?”
“Something stupid. I didn’t even realize how fucking stupid it was until you walked in here looking like the world was crumbling around you,” I whisper the words, but I know she can hear them.
“If you own the building then the tenting is not a surprise to you,” from the slow way she’s talking, I know she’s putting the pieces together.
“It’s not. I instructed the management company to do the tenting,” I admit, unable to look at her as I do.
She screeches, “You fucking what?”
I wince. “I fucked up. I realized it the moment you walked in here and I saw your face. I overstepped. I bulldozed. I was only focused on what I wanted and didn’t consider your feelings at all.”
There’s ice in her voice, “Does the tenting even need to be done?”
I shrug one shoulder in response. “I’m sure it couldn’t hurt,” I hedge, knowing I’m not helping myself in this situation at all.
She sighs, the sound pure exasperation. “Why?”
“Because I wanted to have an excuse for you to be where you belong all the time.” I find the courage to raise my head and look into her eyes. “You belong in our home, with us. You didn’t get the full tour this weekend. There’s one room we didn’t show you. Our room. For all of us. The room we’ve been dreaming about sharing with you.”
Lennon’s eyebrows shoot up to her hairline for a moment before they drop back down, and she glares at me. “Instead of asking, you decided to manipulate the situation and take the choice out of my hands. Again.”
“I was afraid of your answer if I did ask,” I can hear the pain, the raw vulnerability in my voice. I can only hope she can hear it too.
“It wasn’t your choice to make.” She points to herself right where her heart is beating in her chest. “It was mine.”
The way she shakes her head at me while her eyes are filled with disappointment is like a knife to the fucking chest. I think being stabbed would be less painful.
“I’m not moving in with you. I’ll get a hotel,” there’s a finality to her words which almost sends me to my knees.
Lennon turns and then storms out of my office, not bothering to even slam the door on her way out. That’s when I do hit the floor. I stare at the door blankly, wishing she would come back. I’d rather her yell at me than walk away.
