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“You said it was an accident?”
“Yes, ma’am. The state trooper informed me that another car hit them. Your father swerved and over-corrected. Their car veered off into a ditch and hit a tree head-on. The force of the impact broke both their necks. Like I said, it was instantaneous.”
“The other car. The couple who hit my parents. Did they survive?”
I don’t know why I asked. Maybe it was the small part of what humanity I had left, needing to know that no one else was feeling what I was. Grief was relative. Unique to each individual. Maybe I was still in shock. I wasn’t sure, but needing to know about the fate of the other couple was something I desired in that moment.
“I don’t have that information, but I can tell you there were no drugs or alcohol involved. The trooper told me it was just a freak accident.”
I already knew that. The state trooper told me as much when I received the call. I didn’t need the specifics.
Dead was dead.
“Please have their bodies sent to Sellers’ Funeral Home. They are expecting your call.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Is there anything else I need to do?”
“No, ma’am. I am very sorry for your loss.”
“Can you tell me what floor the ICU is on?”
“The seventh floor.”
“Thank you.”
Turning on a dime, I raced out of the cold, sterile room. The sound of my hurried footsteps echoing in the empty hallway. I couldn’t breathe. I didn’t know why I was so eager to leave, only that I was. The compulsion to save myself was too great.
Making my way back up to the lobby, I headed straight for the double doors that led outside. Pushing my way past people, I tried to be apologetic, but no words left my mouth. I needed the night air on my face. To smell the salty sea while the wind blew against my body.
I needed to feel something.
Anything to make me feel alive.
This was too much. I needed to hold it together. I still wasn’t done. There was one more thing I had to do. I couldn’t go upstairs in a complete mess. My parents wouldn’t want that. I needed to keep my head. Focus on the task before me. Once that was done, then I could fall to pieces.
I just needed a moment.
Something to settle my nerves.
Anything to make me feel like I was still part of the living. I needed something normal. Something mundane to reassure me I was still breathing.
“Largo?”
Looking up, I stared into the deepest blue ocean I’d ever seen as the depths of torment swirled around me. His eyes were like an anchor in the storm, something for me to latch on to. As my storm spun violently around me, my focus centered and I grabbed onto him. I allowed myself to fall into the cool waters of the ocean as they carried me away to the depths below, where I was once again safe. Delving deep, I soared into a world I knew. I gave myself willingly to the ocean I loved so much. Even when the waters tightened around me, cocooning me in its embrace while the storm raged on around me, a feeling of peace washed over me as my tormented mind calmed, allowing me to focus.
Just as fast as the storm began, it ended as I pulled away, my footing again on solid ground.
Touching my lips, I could still feel the coolness of the ocean on them. I took a step back, looking up at him, his blue eyes concerned as he reached out to steady me.
“I’m so sorry.”
“Largo, it’s alright. I didn’t mind. What are you doing here, honey?”
“I can ask you that same question, Caleb. Are you following me again?”
“No. A brother laid his bike down. He’s being looked at right now. I am the first to arrive. You’re upset. What’s wrong?”
