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I watch Dylan now from across the room, his strong jaw clenched, his broad shoulders rigid. He's trying so hard to maintain distance.
He's punishing himself, denying what we both want. Seeing him in pain breaks my heart. But my lips are still tingling. My body aches from being stretched and thoroughly used.
The fact Dylan and I had the most intense, mind-blowing sex doesn't change things. Crossing a line puts us in uncharted territory with no clear path back.
“What happens now?” I manage to ask, my voice shaking slightly as I adjust my clothes.
Dylan runs a hand through his disheveled hair, looking just as rattled as I feel. His expression is so raw and vulnerable that it takes my breath away. He's always been so controlled, so professional. Now, the mask has slipped.
“This can't happen again,” Dylan says after a long silence, his voice rough with emotion.
“You're right, it's risky,” I say quietly. “But I've never felt this way before. About anyone.”
I blink back tears, willing myself to be strong. Dylan watches me steadily, his eyes full of tenderness and regret.
“Gemma,” Dylan begins, then falters. He runs his hand through his hair, as if searching for the right words to say. “I swore an oath to protect you, no matter what. If personal feelings cloud my judgment, I can’t do my job. And if I can’t do my job, you’ll be in danger.”
“I understand,” I say, my voice barely a whisper.
Dylan nods, looking pained. “Trust me, walking away from you is the hardest thing I'll ever do.”
He brushes his fingers over my cheek so gently. I lean into his touch, savoring it. “You deserve more than stolen moments in a dark library. That's not mine to give you.”
I nod, not trusting myself to speak because I understand, with perfect clarity that I love him. This obstinate, principled, caring man has my heart.
“You're doing what you think is right. But I don't regret what happened between us.”
Dylan clears his throat gruffly. “Let's get you home.”
As we gather our things in charged silence, I refuse to believe this is the end for us. We're too stubborn to quit without a fight—for us and the future that's right there if we dare to take it and never look back.
In the quiet car ride, unspoken words hang between us. Tension wraps around us like a thick fog, cloying and impenetrable.
Dylan grips the steering wheel with a white-knuckled intensity, his jaw set in a hard line. His rigid shoulders betray an internal battle—duty and desire, fighting for dominance.
The trip from the college grounds to my place is brief. After we arrive, Dylan does his customary safety inspections before saying goodnight.
He gives me a small nod before leaning in to kiss me softly on the lips. It's tender, almost hesitant and so different from our explosive kisses earlier.
“I'll see you tomorrow,” he whispers against my lips before pulling away.
As I brush my teeth and change into my favorite pajamas, the faint smell of his cologne lingers in the air. I find myself absentmindedly tracing the spots where his fingers left a tingle on my skin earlier today.
My mind is consumed with thoughts of our past love as I toss and turn in bed, trying to fall asleep.
Tomorrow is going to be a big day—bridal shopping for my upcoming wedding—and I know I'll need all of my energy to make it through the emotional rollercoaster ahead. If only I could call the bridal boutique and feign illness without raising suspicion.
My mind replays the electrifying moments with Dylan–his fingers tangled in my hair; his lips pressed urgently against mine. What are these forbidden feelings blossoming within me? I've always played by the rules and been the perfect daughter.
Being with Dylan rouses my rebellious spirit. I hug my pillow tight, daring to imagine a different future than the one laid out for me.
I keep asking myself one thing– do I have the guts to control my own fate?
Chapter6
Dylan
I sink into an armchair,looking utterly out of place amidst the frills and chiffon inside Sweet Hearts Bridal boutique. Mrs. Ainsley, the dress fitter, tried shooing me outside during Gemma's fitting, but I refused to leave her.
