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In my next class, I slide into my seat, my mind a whirlpool of thoughts. Books sprawl across the desk, but the words blur together, indecipherable as my focus fractures, and I try to anchor my attention to the professor’s lecture on Gothic literature. But it’s no use, my ears catch every hushed whisper, every stare. Everyone knows about what happened, and it’s not going away.
Is that why the guys are suddenly surrounding me? To protect me again?
The clock ticks torturously slow, mocking me. Every minute stretches, a marathon to the end of the day. When it’s finally over, relief floods me, but it’s chased by the dread of walking out into the open, into the crude jokes and cruel laughs.
The crisp autumn breeze whips my hair aroundmy face, and I curl it back over my ears. I shuffle my bag higher on my shoulder, willing my feet to move faster across the fallen leaves that carpet the walkway.
“Ever, wait.”
Damien’s voice crashes into my escape. He falls into step beside me, his presence both a shield and a cage. I suck in a deep breath, trying to swallow down the nagging suspicion crawling under my skin.
“Hey,” he says, and it’s casual, too casual for someone who’s part of the group that’s suffocating me with their silent surveillance.
“Hi,” I reply, my voice tight. “Good day?”
“Usual.” He shrugs, tucking his hands into the pockets of his dark jeans.
“So I hear you’re pretty great at study stuff. I suck, and I need to ace this year. After this week, would you mind sitting with me, maybe going over how I can focus on the work and not any and everything else?”
“Don’t you get a pass anyway?”
The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them, and I wince as his face goes blank.
“What makes you say that?”
“I’m sorry!” I blurt out. “It was rude and unfounded.”
“Wow, you don’t mince words, do you?” His slight smile puts me at ease that he isn’t really offended, probably more shocked at my accusation.
“Sorry.”
“Stop apologising. You’re right, I do, but I want more than that.”
His confirmation of the suspicions that surround the elite at this University hits me square in the chest. It makes me sad that the class divide is still so strong.
“Sure, I can help you.”
We round the corner, and the house looms ahead, a sanctuary that’s lost its sanctity. I quicken my pace, eager to slip inside and shed the invisible cloak of everyone’s attention.
“Thanks. You’re the best.”
This whole conversation has been weird and almost forced. I don’t get it. Why is he trying to have a conversation with me?
“See you later, Ever.” Damien’s farewell is a whisper against the back of my neck as he follows me inside, a ghost touch that promises I’m never truly alone.
“Later,” I echo, and the front door closes behind me with a click that sounds oddly like a lock sealing me in.
I dart up the stairs and down the hallway to my room. The door swings open, and I stumble inside, slamming it shut with a shove of my shoulder. The sound echoes, a resounding declaration of temporary solitude.
Alone. Finally.
I lean back against the wood, letting my head fall back with a thud. My breath comes out in a rush as I try to banish the twisted knot of anxiety in my stomach. I peel off my jacket, tossing it carelessly onto the bed, where it lands in a crumpled heap, mirroring the disarray of my thoughts.
“Safe.” The word is a whisper to myself, a feeble attempt to calm the racing of my pulse. I kick off my shoes and toe them aside. There is no need for pretences now, no eyes to judge, no whispers to dissect.
It’s another battle, another day to navigate the precarious waters of KnightsGate University. But tonight, I have a reprieve. Tonight, I’m just Ever—no titles, no expectations, no prying eyes, no videos following me around, no whispers behind my back.
And for now, that’s enough.
