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He was questioning his vows. He was suddenly questioning the path he’d been on practically his entire life.
CHAPTER5
The marble steps were drizzled with glossy moisture from a predawn rain. As she approached the landing one hundred pigeons took flight, their wings pounding against their soft sides like the pages of a broken-in bible being turned by an impatient thumb. Samantha looked past the silent parapet where the cavernous bell hung idle, one thousand pounds of steel capable of singing over valleys, past the mountains, bringing comfort to thousands, yet leaving her empty.
Heavy oak double doors, three times the size of any man, stood before her, an architectural feat in beauty and engineering. Enormous stone buttresses countered by delicate brass moldings accentuated the ancient hand crafted windows of martyrs perfected in cubism glass.
An angelic echo of Latin words told her it was time.
Sam’s fingers wrapped around the heavy brass knob. The heaviness of the door earned her full attention as she slipped past the fortress-worthy threshold. As her hand released its burden a grave thud sounded behind her. This was a place meant to welcome, but Sam had no right to be here.
The chorus of unseen voices rang in slow cadence, intended to beckon, but her heavy bare feet only prodded slowly over the cold ivory slab. It was as chilling as a mausoleum. The pool of holy water to her right was too shallow to bathe her sins in.
Water.
Her unutterable fears set her feet into motion.
Impressive scrollwork had been painstakingly chiseled into the walls climbing to heights meant to humble all men. Dappled colors of sunlight dyed by vibrant glass panes blended to a soft haze of gold and the angels continued to sing in a rhythmic hum of syllables her ears could not decipher.
Like little soldiers, wooden pews stood patiently alone in an unending line. Ivory columns decorated their shoulders like rifles at the ready. Chandeliers sparkled, catching rays of light and propelling prisms over bronze placards marking tombs spaced throughout the granite walls. An intricate scene of heaven graced the cathedral ceiling seeming so real a child would believe it a secret passage to paradise.
Two cents to pay the toll.
Her feet carried her for an eternity, all the while her mind reached for forgotten words. Prayers were like pledging the flag; sometimes they needed to be said in a tune to acquire the next line. How did the Act of Contrition start?
Oh my God, I am heartily sorry…
Beyond the altar stood soundless pipes stacked a hundred in a row, but they only played for those willing to atone. She heard nothing.
A marble table decorated in holy cloths claimed the focus of the grand and forgotten place. The golden tabernacle secured with a delicate lock hid treasures below a sculpture of the Madonna on the right. A candle that never extinguished burned to the left. And above all else, hung Jesus on the cross.
Oh my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended thee.
Sam should leave. She did not belong in this place. She tainted it by simply being there.
The clap of a door shutting echoed from the left followed by the click-clack of sure footsteps upon the ivory floor. Her eyes darted to the shadows in hopes of finding a place to hide. She could not be seen here.
I detest all my sins.
“Sammy?”
Sam turned to the beckoning voice. Colin stood, formally attired in a long black robe, black satin buttons ticking from collar to hem. He looked right. His perfectly combed hair and clean-shaven face a beautiful match for such a pure starched white badge upon an expanse of black.
He smiled and placed something on the altar as he approached. “How are you? You look well.”
Sam said nothing. His calm manner disarmed her. When he stood just in front of her she finally said, “You’ve made your vows.”
“I have.”
“I thought…”
He tilted his head, his soft eyes wondering at her surprise. “You thought I wouldn’t?”
“No, I mean…” her words felt clumsy. “I don’t know what I thought. I should be going.”
He placed a gentle hand on her arm. “Did you come here for the sacrament? Would you like a blessing?”
Her eyes clouded with tears. She was so stupid. “No. No, I cannot take sacrament. I’m not worthy.”
