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That was something I hadcertainlynever felt.
I gasped as the butterflies exploded once more, sending tingles up and down me. I grabbed hold of fistfuls of ash in lieu of sheets and wrapped my legs around him, wanting to pull him closer; I hadn’t taken a breath in what felt like hours, and I couldn’t, not until he was all the way inside me.
When I finally exhaled, it was a shuddered, labored sound unlike any I had ever made before. Abaddon held himself above me, one hand dug into the ash by the side of my head, the othercarefully placed on my hip. He throbbed inside of me, and that pulse of sensation sent a fresh wave of warm tingles through me.
“Ready?” he asked, his voice a low grumble in his throat.
I nodded at him, then I raised an ashen hand up to his face, my fingertips searching for the back of his neck. I drew him close to me, and we kissed again. I exhaled into his mouth when he slid out of me, and breathed in when he gently slid himself back in.
The pleasure.
The euphoria.
How had we angels been given the ability to do this, but been denied it for so long?
Our rhythms synchronized, my body moving to the tune of his own. His quickening movements shortened the space between his breaths. I could feel the tension in his body, the strain of his muscles as he moaned with every thrust. The ash really was getting everywhere; I felt like I was being pushed into it, but I didn’t want him to stop.
He kissed my lips.
He kissed my neck.
I bit his earlobe and he groaned against my ear, his wings spread rapidly—expanding and unfurling—and between them… Light.
A soft ball of illumination began to grow. I watched it expand, pulsing with every breath, every movement, every pleasurable sound that burst from his lips. He grabbed hold of the ash by my head with both hands, pulled himself to me, slammed himself all the way in, and as he erupted the ball of light between his wings shattered into a million glittering motes of light that showered us both.
My eyes widened, my mouth opened, and on the back of a sigh I enjoyed Abaddon’s release and the gentle cascade of Light.
He smiled at me, kissed me deeply and rolled on the ash next to me, pulling me into a deep embrace.
There was nowhere else I wanted to be in that moment, on Earth nor in Heaven.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
SARAKIEL
It was the day before Medrion’s expected arrival, but morale was high. Combat drills were taking place on the hour, the bastion’s defenses were being shored up, and Seekers were running wide patrols throughout the day. Underneath the bustle in activity—I didn’t think I’d ever seen the bastion so alive—there was the now familiar feeling of dread.
This could all be gone tomorrow.
In the time since the Fall, groups of angels had fought several times, but never had they killed. The battle would wage until one side was too injured and tired to continue, a surrender would be agreed and to the winner the spoils. Sometimes it was land they wanted, access to resources, or simply to bolster their numbers.
Abaddon had done his job well; the angels at Helena knew that surrender was not an option. We could only hope that they would not break as soon as the first angel went down.
As anxious as I was, I couldn’t help smiling to myself at the thought of Abaddon.
We had shared the night together at the summit of a volcano, surrounded by nothing but stars and open ocean. It was hard to believe I was thinking of romance at a time like this, but if these were going to be my last days on earth, I preferred to spend themwith him; the angel who for some reason could make me feel like I was the most important being in the cosmos.
I had expected to wake up with some new mark of sin tattooed across my body, a great big glaring sign that shoutedyes, I had sexto everyone around me, but there were none. I hadn’t thought it was possible for Abaddon to keep track of his many scars, but he seemed to know each of them intimately, and there were no additions to his tapestry, either.
Before last night I’d known next to nothing about sex, and even less about angel sex. It just wasn’t something we’d ever needed to do, or even felt the urge to do before the Fall. Lust was a sin, so it stood to reason that desire and romance were sins too. Angels didn’t fall in love. We were commanded to love humans, but that wasn’t the same… and the few angels who had taken that commandment too far had been condemned—Gadriel amongst them.
Lust though, I was familiar with Lust. It had crept into pretty much every conversation I’d ever had with the Tyrant, but last night was different. It felt right. Like he was the only one who saw the pieces that made me—both good and bad—and not only accepted them but also wanted them all. In his eyes I was perfect.
And as wonderful as it sounded, I was also terrified that I couldn’t live up to his version of me.
On that thought, I found myself heading toward the medical quarters in search of someone specific. Medrion was due at any time, and I wasn’t sure I would get another chance to make this one thing right. To fix the mistake I’d made with someone who had never actually done anything to upset me.
When I found Kalmiya, she was sitting by herself at a table in a dining area adjacent to the main medical ward. She had her head in her hands and was bouncing one of her knees. Her wings, resplendent and pearl white, were tucked behindher back. Though she had no reason to, she was wearing her black, Ebon Legion armor which had clearly been repaired and polished.
