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“But…”
Yep, there it is. I drop my cloth and stand, taking some comfort in the growing mass of hair creams and skin products above the sink. Sebastian and I don’t bother to separate our stuff, and seeing it merged like this never fails to send my heart into an excited skitter.
“I can’t sell it as it is. There are too many characters weighing down the plot, and while I really like the angle of the romance with the older brother, the other guy and his sister need to be cut down and changed around. I get what you’re going for, but it’s messing the pacing up. Once they move into Victor’s house, everything grinds to a halt.”
Okay. All valid points, and I have my answer now. It’s as disappointing as I knew it would be, but also… relieving? I’ve been waiting for this answer for, shit, probably twenty years, if I’m honest. A weight hanging over me, my life a giant Jenga game where one wrong move could send it all toppling.
But I don’t have to wonder anymore. It’s a no.
“Thank you again for reading it. I knew it was a long shot, but I appreciate it.”
And as the knot between my ribs unravels itself, I realize I mean that. Because I tried. I stopped running from what I wanted and I proved to myself that I could take that leap. Who cares if it didn’t work out? Failure isn’t adead end, simply a setback, an obstacle I can overcome with practice and time.
The fissure of restlessness begins to spark to life under my skin. Hearing no is strangely motivating.
Giulia’s voice is kind. “Of course. How quickly can you make the changes and get it back to me?”
Wait. What? “You still want it?”
She laughs. “Like I said, there’s a lot of potential here. I’ve noticed it before, but here, your voice really shines. I love the tension between Haisley and both of her father figures. It needs a cleaning up, but you’ve got something good here. It’s not usually a genre I deal with, but a colleague of mine will absolutely want to read it.”
I’m speechless. And bubbling over with ideas. With another two weeks, if I work my ass off, I can probably turn it around. “I can get it back to you in a month,” I say, because if I’ve learned anything by now, it’s that I should be taking my time and enjoying it.
“Okay, a month it is. Oh, and make sure you include a summary of the sequel, so we can pitch it as a duology.”
Holy shit. Holy shit. This is actually happening. Yes, my first attempt wasn’t right, and I know that even if Giulia likes my rewrite, the pitch might not be successful. Acquisitions boards are brutal about profits and market trends, and I had enough experience with memoirs to know not to expect a yes, no matter how much my editor loved it.
But this still felt like one hell of a win.
Sebastian is wrist deep in potting mix when I hang up. “She said yes. Sort of. More like a pre-yes, if I change some things.” I bounce on my toes as the words tumble out ofmy mouth. “But do you know what I realized? Even if the book gets rejected, it’s okay. Because I don’t want to stop here. I want to try again. This book, the next one, and the next one. No matter what happens. And I have you to thank.” For so many things, but we’ll start here.
Sebastian shakes off the excess dirt, slipping off his gloves and wiping his hands on his jeans. Does he even understand how utterly drop-dead gorgeous he is at every moment?
“I might have helped, but you got this on your own, because you’re amazing.” He leans in to kiss my cheek, smelling like soil and sweat. I really want to peel him out of these clothes and taste him.
I slip my arms around his waist, pressing my forehead to his chest. “I’m not going anywhere. You know that, right?”
There’s a dark smudge across his brow, his hair in complete disarray. Pretty and dirty all at once.
“Good. I couldn’t let you go, even if I wanted to.”
It’s a good thing I have quick reflexes. I throw my hands around his neck as he sweeps me into his arms and stalks to his bedroom.
37
SEBASTIAN
Tears clingto Bee’s lashes, and splashes of red stain her cheeks and lips.
“Look at you, so needy for it.”
I thumb her lower lip where it’s stretched tight around my cock. Slowly, I pull out of her mouth, admiring her swollen lips, slick with spit and precum. Cupping her cheek, I lean in to taste us. Perfect. When I nip at the sensitive flesh, she whines. Chases my dick when I brush it along her mouth, teasing, keeping it just out of her reach.
“Patience, angel. Be good for me.”
I tighten my hold in her hair, pulling taut, feeling the exact moment she releases the tension, giving in to me completely. Her eyes flutter closed, her jaw limp, taking every thrust. I slide down her perfect throat, deeper, tighter, fucking her freely. She is so good. So perfect. Taking me like she needs to.
“I have a question for you now,” I say, pulling her into my lap.
