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I stepped out of the closet to find more chaos than when I left, with luggage everywhere.
“Do you mind if we share the closet with you?” Rowan asked.
“Of course. Sorry I hogged it.”
He stared at me, eyes roving over the pajamas I wore. But there wasn’t any judgment or derision on his face. There was… heat. Rowan cleared his throat. “That’s not what I meant. If you want your own space, it’s okay.”
“Oh.”
Avoiding the rest of their gazes, I went to the stacks of pillows and grabbed some, claiming a corner on the edge of the bed near the windows. There were more than enough pillows to do what I needed, so I began to line them up in a rectangle, blocking off the little chunk of the bed from the rest of it.
“Isolde?” Hawk’s voice caught my attention. I turned to look and froze. Low-slung black sweats and nothing else. The tattoos he had ran down both arms, but more than that. They flowed over his shoulders and down his sides, disappearing into those same sweatpants.
The tattoos framed his abs and the rest of his chest, his hair a little messy like he’d run his fingers through it while he changed. My mind didn’t need any more invitation—it filled my mind with images of the two of us. Me licking those abs as I fell to my knees. Those tattooed arms holding me down and moving me wherever he wanted.
Fuck.
I swallowed. “Yeah?”
He smirked like he knew exactly what I’d been thinking. “I know you didn’t expect to be in the same room with us, but I promise we’re not going to touch you if you don’t want us to.”
The pillows. I hadn’t thought they might think I didn’t trust them. What I didn’t say was that the pillows weren’t for them. They were for me. I didn’t trust myself this close to them, and I hadn’t decided what I wanted to do about the discussion Ocean and I had.
“I know.”
He smiled. “Just making sure.”
The rest of them took turns going in and out of the closet and the bathroom, and I was treated to five bodies that were on the verge of me sayingfuck it.
I slipped into the bathroom and brushed my teeth, not fully prepared for the sight of all five of them sprawled across the giant bed. Hawk was the closest to my little nest.
“You guys okay for the lights?”
Murmurs of agreement drove me to the light switch, and I practically dove into the bed, nestling beneath blankets and cuddling into too many pillows. I closed my eyes, but they were soclose. I could still smell them, tempting me closer. I could hear their breath.
“Isolde,” came the whisper. Cade’s voice. “Will you tell us how you met Beau?”
Here in the dark, it didn’t feel as vulnerable, and the comfort of finally being in bed and relaxed loosened my tongue. “We worked together. Tate Marketing. It’s the biggest marketing firm on this side of the country.”
“We know of it,” Vaughn said. “They do good work.”
“They do. I got a job there for graphic design, and I got it myself. Not because of my parents or anyone else. Beau is one of their ad executives. I mean, he is now. He was a junioraccount manager when we met and he was…” I sighed. “He was charming.”
Way too charming. Maybe that had been a sign?
“The lunch room. I had been craving a blueberry muffin, and they were out. But Beau was in line in front of me and had taken the last one. He saw the look on my face and gave it to me.
“It was our thing after that. The next day I found a blueberry muffin on my desk, and he kept bringing them to me. We became friends, and not long after that…” I shrugged even though they couldn’t see me.
“It came together so easily. I just said to Ocean today, I think I fell in love with him in a month. And things were good. I thought we were happy. Or at least happy enough. Then one day it was all gone. I know things don’t happen out of the blue, so I missed something. I just wish whatever I missed hadn’t taken four years.”
I turned on my back and stared at the ceiling. Now that the dam was open, I couldn’t stop. “I just didn’t see it coming. We lived together. He came home one weekend, he’d been out with friends, and told me it was over. That I needed to take my stuff and get out by the end of the next week. He wouldn’t tell me why. Hell, he wouldn’t sayanythingelse to me. After he left again, I got what I could, and I was gone before he came back that night. Only took what I couldn’t live without. And by the end of the week, I was across the country, doing the last tasks at my job remotely.He’dbeen promoted. I just…”
My breath caught, and a familiar ache filled my chest. More because of my confusion and lack of closure than grieving anything to do with Beau. Which made it worse. Shouldn’t I be sadder? “I couldn’t face all the questions and all the pity. Instead, I ran and made everyone think I had something to hide.”
A harsh laugh. Vaughn. “I doubt that.”
“It’s true,” I said. “The people here only know and care about what they see. And because I didn’t dress up and go out holding my head held high, I’m—” I lifted my hand and let it drop back onto my stomach. “It doesn’t matter. But that’s why I couldn’t be here alone.”
