AllFreeNovel
Share Us
And something inside me flips. “No!” I thrust up into her, one hand moving to her shoulder to keep her body in place while my other hand moves to squeeze her nipple. She cries out.
“Is that what you want, Jocelyn?” Matt asks. I glare at him, pinching her nipple harder, making her squeal.
“Harder,” she pants. “Deeper, faster.”
“Can you do it, Ben?” Matt taunts me and I want to slap him. “Can you give her what she needs?”
The last remnants of my self-control slip away from me even as I realise that he’s taunting me, pushing me to do more, be more. I look between us once again to where we’re joined. I see her body stretched around my cock, the way her skin moves as I thrust in and out of her.
There’s a fine line when you’re with a woman between giving her some control and you being dominant. I’m not sure where I’m sitting on that right now. I’m far from being the one in control, it’s my frantic movements that are giving her pleasure, but at the same time I’m controlling the depth, the speed of her pleasure. If I ask her to fuck me instead, she’ll be the one in control of all of that, but on the other hand, I’ll be the one being pleasured. But we can do this other times, in other ways. It doesn’t have to be everything all at once.
There will be other times. Some ball of tension inside of me loosens.
“Eyes on me,” I demand and she stares at me immediately. I feel a rush of joy at her obedience, beginning to see what Matt gets out of it. My hands drop to her hips and I smooth them around her warm, perfect skin, loving the feel of her where she’s more padded. I force her to slow down our movements and grind deep against her, causing her to gasp.
“Ben!”
Her head tips back and I see the signs that she’s about to come. Her breath is being held for longer periods of time and she’s clenching me tight inside her. She’s all pink-cheeked and there’s a fine sheen of sweat on her brow and upper lip. I change my angle slightly to hit her clit in a slightly different way, and it’s enough to tip her over the edge. The ecstatic whimper that escapes her throat is nearly enough for me to decide to just stop being a fucking idiot about this whole thing and get down on my knees and beg her to do exactly what she wants with me for the rest of our lives.
But… I’m not going to.
She collapses against my chest, her arms still bound and causing her to shift to try to ease the pressure on them. I tug the knot free and she makes a small, sweet sound that I feel as much as hear. Her arms snake around my back, and I’d say she holds me tight, but her body is limp and sated. Her hands touch my back, her arms squeezing briefly, then they fall away. I push her hair back so I can see her face, but her eyes remain closed even though I know she knows I’m watching her.
I lean down and press a kiss to her temple, and she rubs her head against my lips.
“Ben,” Matt says, and I lift my head and look at him. We’ve lived together for two years now, been lovers far longer. Casually at first, then more exclusively as time passed, and we realised just how well our sexual preferences complemented one another’s. There have been other women between us, not to mention under us and on top of us. But Jocelyn is the one who has meant the most to both of us.
Last summer it was me who nearly ruined it before it even began. Oh, we’ve sorted the whole thing out now. I’ve apologised for my behaviour, but there’s just one thing that has never passed my lips. Something that’s poisoning our relationship. And now I need to… I’m not sure. Admit it? Maybe not. Test them to see if my fears are, in fact, justified? Maybe.
Should I do it? Should I risk everything we have for something… something that’s really been my fault from the start? Should I just let it all go? Tell them I love them both, apologise for my weird behaviour since I got home this evening, or worse, insinuate that perhaps more happened with Alicia tonight than actually did so that there’s a good reason for them to push me away and it won’t just be because the two of them are in love and I’m just some third wheel who was convenient for some fun for a while but who isn’t part of that perfect little hetero-normative future with marriage and kids and whatever else all that entails without the giant bi fuck up that is me to get in the way.
“Ben,” Matt says again, far more softly this time. “What do you need?”
Immediately I tense. How dare he? He’s doing it again, isn't he? Being the dominant one, making sure that I know that I need him to… Well, to function in this relationship.
“I need you to do what you’re told for once,” I snap. And immediately regret it. Jocelyn’s head snaps up, but her gaze is still unfocused.
“Ben,” she whispers. “Don’t…”
But I can’t stop. I’ve come this far. I have to know once and for all that our whole relationship isn’t about me always being the one on the bottom. That Matt can compromise, too.
Beside me, Matt drops to his knees. He’s naked, and I wonder how I missed him stripping out of his boxers. Usually I watch every move he makes waiting to anticipate how best to please him and now… Now he seems to have realised without me saying the words exactly what I need. A tiny spark of joy ignites inside me.
I have this amazingly beautiful woman who is warm and sated and full of my cum, snuggled here in my arms, and kneeling at my feet, buttocks on his heels, hands behind his back and head lowered, is Matt, who has never been anything but my Dom before. Never been anything but anyone’s Dom before as far as I know. I reach for his chin, needing to move Jocelyn in order to do so, and she watches me curiously as I tilt his chin up.
“Look at me,” I order him, gratified when he follows the instruction instantly. I’m not totally fooled, though. I can see the tension in his body, the tightness in his jaw. He hates this. It’s utterly alien to him and yet, he’s doing it.
And I know the only reason he’s doing it is for me.
“Once, Matt. Just once.” I want to say please. I want to beg him to give me this, but doing so would rather defeat the whole point of the exercise. So I bite my tongue and stop the words from coming out.
Matt
Ben’s insecurities have been an issue for us before. When I first met Jocelyn, I knew she was the one for us, but then it turned out that Ben had met her already. They were working together, and he was the giant asshole I’d heard her complaining about numerous times when she visited my shop. He knew where she trained, who her family was and assumed she was a stuck-up snob with more opportunities than her talent deserved. His words, not mine. Ben sometimes forgets that my background is every bit as wealthy as Jocelyn’s and just because I choose to work and run a business doesn’t mean I have to.
They’ve been less of an issue for us in the bedroom, however, and I’m genuinely wondering what has brought this on. I’m older than him, was already far more experienced by the time we met, although he was far from being a virgin, so we fell into the roles we prefer easily. He’s never topped me and now, as I watch his face and read his body language, I realise that this is something I’ve failed to see in him.
I can see the desperation in his face and it looked like it almost killed him to frame that as a demand rather than beg me for it. There’s a fine line between being in control and refusing to listen to others and maybe even bullying. I’ve never seen myself that way, but tonight is making me reassess… everything, really. And it’s hard to work out what to say, how I can give him permission to be the one in control for once, without being the one in control in order to do so. As I struggle to unpick a way around that paradox, it hits me that there is only one thing that I really need to say right now. It might not fix everything, it might not fix anything, but he needs to know. It’s both the hardest, and the easiest thing I’ve ever said to him.
