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When I make it to the studio, Annie is doing barre warm-ups. I head straight to her and get behind her, taking my position. We both stretch for a few minutes before she turns around and narrows her eyes at me.
“Why have you been crying?”
“I—” I consider lying to her. But she knows me better than anyone else at this point, so I don’t think I could pull it off. So instead, I go with the truth. “Nikolai sat next to me in class…said he wantsclosure.”
“What does that even mean?” She asks with a raised eyebrow.
“I don’t know. He said he wants to talk.” I reply. “So I invited him to my party.”
“You didwhat?” she exclaims, looking around and seeing many eyes on us. She lowers her voice, “Are you out of your mind? Leo is going to be there. Could you imagine if you got caught?”
“I’d die.” I nod. “But I need to know what he wants, Annie. My heart still hurts.”
“He wasmean, Cam.” She sighs, her brown eyes hard. “He wasn’t just a little hurtful, he was an asshole. I still like him, but he is an ass.”
“I know…”
“Are you sure you want to do this?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m here for you, babe.” She squeezes my arm and stretches again while facing me. “And if you need me to kill him, I’ll do it.”
I laugh at that, my eyes tearing up again. I appreciate the gesture, but we both know she’ll never be able to kill Nikolai Pavlov. He probably has a lot of experience killing people by now, and she doesn’t stand a chance. No, the only one he wouldn’t hurt is me, that much I’m sure of, even if he hates me. I wonder how many girls he’s been with since we were together last. How many has he given those three little words to? How many has he begged on his knees for? But something tells me the number hasn’t grown. He probably learned how to have some pride after that.
“We both know that’s never going to happen, Annie.” I roll my eyes, “But it’s the thought that counts…”
“Right?” She chuckles, “But now it’s time to have fun, Cam. So forget all about him, and let’s race fouettés.”
“Alright,” I tell her with a chuckle.
Ever since we were little girls, we would race fouettés. It was our friendly competition to prove who was better than the other. We were usually an even match, but now I’m starting to beat her, and it’s become a little more competitive than it used to be.
I get into the fourth position, bend my knees slightly, push up into the retiré position, and then turn. And then I do it again and again. No one is counting for us, so this one is just for fun, no competition. She stops first though, and then I do too, laughing. She narrows her eyes then rolls them.
“I guess I owe you lunch for this one.” It’s what we usually do for each other. Whoever loses pays for lunch.
“Fine, but you pick.” I grin. “I don’t think I can make good decisions today.”
“You’re not wrong.” She tuts. “But maybe it’s not so terrible to give him a chance to explain himself.”
“It’s just going to be really painful.”
And I don’t think I’m ready for more pain.
14 Years Old
Annie and I finish on stage, ending the recital with a pirouette. I grab her hand and haul her to the back, peering into the crowd to try to spot my family and Leo, who I guess is like family too. At least my future husband and best friend. But it’s hard to tell where anyone is with the bright lights shining in my eyes. I squint anyway and attempt it one more time, to no avail. Oh well, it looks like I’m going to have to wait until they come looking for me.
Sure enough, as soon as I walk back toward the changing area, Leo awaits me with a bouquet of red roses. His brown hair shines when the light hits it, and his dreamy light brown eyes twinkle when he sets them on me. Butterflies erupt in my stomach the closer I walk toward him, and the only reason I remember Annie is with me is because she’s grabbing onto my arm for dear life.
The smile I give him reaches all the way to my eyes; I can feel it, and when I’m close enough to touch him, he yanks me from Annie’s grip and presses his soft, pillowy lips to mine. Every kiss with him is an experience. Sometimes gentle and sweet, and other times passionate and mean, like he wants to eat me alive. Tonight, he’s behaving, and I get the sweetest kiss from him. It makes me feel loved, cherished, as he always does.
“Cam,” He smiles against my lips, and I push away slightly so my parents don’t kill us. They know we’re together, but we’re still expected to act a certain way in public and in front of them. Not that Annie would say anything. “You were perfect.”
“Thank you, Leo.” I grin, pulling away when I see my parents coming from the edge of my vision. “These are beautiful.”
I grab the flowers, smelling the sweet aroma for good measure, and then grab Annie’s hand.
