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Lucía’s lips parted, and I could see her move closer to me, her blue eyes searching my face. It was dim, but her features were almost highlighted. I took a deep breath and looked at her mouth, closer and closer.
Without a second thought, but also incredibly aware of what I was doing, I leaned in, closing the millimetric gap between us. Her breath mingled with mine, a delicate dance of warmth and anticipation.
We were kissing. And it was tender and rough at the same time. Urgent but trivial.
And it felt so good to be so close to her after all this time.
Because the moment I pressed my mouth to Lucía’s, I was done for. Unraveled. Everything drifted away until it was only us, our panting breaths loud over the sounds of the storm, the purring cat somewhere else, having jumped off the couch with the clumsy movements. She was close, so close that her knees were touching my thighs, and the only thing I had to do was reach for her thigh so she was straddling me. Our bodies created the most delicious friction, her hands draped around my shoulders and the lightest of touches making my skin light up.
“There,” I said in between pecks. The corner of her mouth, her chin, the column of her neck. She was on my lap, tight against my body.
“Okay,” she whispered back, almost like the word left her mouth automatically, a response to the stimuli. “Like this?” She rocked her hips once, settling on that one spot that had me clenching my jaw at the sensation. She let out a gasp, her movement small and deliberate, one of her hands on my hair, tugging at my scalp with need.
My hands lowered down to her waist, holding on for dear life because if I let her go, even for a moment, she might slip away, like she did once already.
So here we were, fused to each other, hands moving all around with reckless abandon.
It was so serious, our movements in the shadows, like we were hiding from something, maybe from the light of day, from moments when our relationship was so different than how it was in the darkness. But then, Lucía smiled.
I felt it with my mouth and with my body because her movements became relaxed, as if she was melting into me. And honestly, I was melting into her too. So I smiled back, trying with all that I could to show her how long I’d been waiting for this.
But even if I could tell her, if words formed and came out of my mouth, she didn’t remember me. So we could pretend for a little bit longer while she was sitting on my lap, rocking her hips and making those little sounds?—
Lucía shifted slightly, her hands loosening on my hair and sliding down to my shirt, down my torso and under the fabric. Her fingers moved shyly on my skin, like they were slowly committing every inch of me to memory. I grunted atthe sensation, and Lucía took the opportunity to slide down to the side of the couch, taking me with her, her soft body under mine.
And it felt like a fantasy. Like this was supposed to have happened in the past and my memory was tricking me. Her smell enveloping us, her smile all over me. The smooth skin of her neck was almost addicting, like I could just stay there, my tongue rolling over that long column forever.
She sighed, and I wanted to reciprocate the feeling.
Finally,I thought. And like she read my mind, she whispered, “Yes,” then smiled into our kiss again. Her teeth knocked into mine, and a small giggle came out of her throat. It felt like we were tangled up with each other for hours, the sounds and the lights of the storm long gone.
Then the lights came on.
And we were both startled into normality.
19
LUCÍA
Crap.
Shit.Oh my god, what did you do?
My eyes shot open, and my body stilled, the lights blinding me for a fraction of a second until I could get my bearings. Francisco was hovering over my body, his whole weight resting on his forearms by my head, his eyes hooded and a lazy smile on his face. I closed my lids for a second because I needed the darkness to think.
Shit.
He froze over me in… surprise? Shock? Remorse? Who even knew, but I had to get out of that situation immediately.
He was my patient’s brother. And he didn’t remember me, so no.
No, thank you.
“Stop thinking so loud,” he said, his mouth rightover my ear. His voice was raspy, sounding like I would think he sounded when he woke up first thing in the morning, in a warm bed with me next to him.
“Oh god,” I whispered, my eyes still closed, trying to avoid him at all costs. Maybe if I just lay there, he would eventually get the memo and leave? Wishful thinking for sure. “I’m so sorry.”
“For what?” His mouth trailed down my neck towards my bare shoulder, the strap of my tank top having ridden down at some point. It was the weirdest thing. My brain was telling me I needed to shut this down immediately, but my body was not responding, just like that time at the hospital when he hugged me so tightly, I thought my heart was going to burst out of my chest from the emotion. “For this?”
