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I thought doing one last muster with the fellas would be closure or cathartic or some other bullshit, but it's not. I'm down in the dumps. Nothing is good now that Col's gone. And, yes, I know that sounds all sorts of pathetic, but it's the truth.
We make good progress, the day flying by in a whirl of dust, noise, and the unmistakable smell that accompanies moving thousands of head of cattle. We have about two weeks left in the season, and then all that will be left to do is the final checks on the animals before they get sold off.
By the time I jump into the Landy and drive the short distance from the makeshift helipad to the house at the end of the day, I am beat. I stink. I'm starving. And I amnotin the mood to deal with whoever has shown up at the house unannounced, leaving their shiny white Tesla parked outside.
I scowl as I stalk past it on the way to the house, growling when I see the rental sticker on the front windshield. Who the fuck is visiting us in a rental car? For a minute, I think it could be Gus and Tate. But why wouldn't they have told me they were coming for a visit when I spoke to them last week?
I leap up the porch steps, swing open the front door, and march inside, stopping in my tracks when I reach the living room doorway and my eyes land on the figure sitting cross-legged on the floor, helping Kolby with his schoolwork on the coffee table.
"Col!"
A slow clap comes from the corner of the room. I hadn't even noticed Emma sitting there. "As a measure of my respect, I am restricting my bitchiness by not making a catty remark, and I'll take this little one with me into the kitchen. Remember thismoment when nominations for The Australian of the Year come out."
"Awww, but I don't wanna leave Col."
"We can have Gran's cookies," Em tells Kolby.
"Bye, Col!"
Kolby shoots out of the room so fast I can't even ruffle his hair. Em levels me with a look I can't quite decipher—like maybe she's happy for me?—as she brushes past.
I walk over to Col as he gets to his feet and promptly falls into me. "Ah, shit. Both my legs have gone to sleep."
"Sure, sure." I hold him up as he winces, kicking his legs out to try and get them working properly again. "We'll just ignore the fact that you fell into my arms, shall we?"
It takes him a moment or two, but he finally manages to steady himself on his feet. He swings those blue-green eyes my way, and, holy hell,myknees wobble. They're sparkling and alive, and, fuck, I've missed him.
As if pulled by invisible magnets, we lunge at each other, mauling each other's faces like we've been kiss-starved all our lives, which, in all honesty, it feels like I have been. These past two months without Col have stretched for eons.
He grabs the side of my face and my fingers charge into his hair, our tongues surging into each other's mouths. He's just as needy as I am, tugging my body close so that our groins are pressed together. I have a feeling that if my family weren't in the room next to us, clothes would be hitting the wooden floor right about now.
When we finally come up for air, I still can't believe he's standing in my living room.
"What are you doing here? When did you arrive? Why didn't you tell me so that I could've picked you up?"
"That's a lot of questions for my jet-lagged brain to process."
"Not to mention…" I take half a step back and indicate towards his bulge. "All the blood's down there."
He laughs, shaking his head in what I realise is his signature move. He looks like he always does whenever he's around me. Like he's half exasperated, half secretly having the best time of his life.
"Come on, let's have a seat."
We walk over to the sofa and sit down, our knees knocking against each other.
"Okay, so, I arrived around midday. Then it took me a few hours to drive out here. I didn't tell you I was coming because I wanted it to be a surprise…which, I take it, it is?"
I nod. "Yeah. It sure fucking is. Had no clue. I was spewing when I walked in here, thinking some arsewipe door-to-door salesperson had come around to bug us."
Col laughs, but when he finishes, his eyes turn a darker shade. He schools his features into a serious expression, reaching out and curling the tips of his fingers over mine.
"And the reason I'm here is because…" He sucks in a breath. "I'm here because I want to be with you. I'm relocating to Australia for work, which means we… Us… This thing…" He waves his hand between us. "It can happen. If you want it to, that is?"
"Um…" I swipe a hand through my hair and ease my way out of his grip.
"Oh god. What is it? What's wrong? Oh no." He clasps a hand over his mouth. "You've met someone. That's why you've been messaging less and less. Fuck, I'm an idiot. Of course you've moved on with someone els?—"
I lift my hand. "Can you shut up for a minute please?"
