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She was still in the throes of her heat and would be for a few more days if my guess was right. It would be easy to keep her here while she was desperate to ease the pain and emptiness, but once it was over, I had a bad feeling she’d do everything in her power to push us as far away as she could.
Lucy was terrified. That much was obvious from what she’d said to Cas, but I didn’t think it was for the reason she’d implied.
Most alphas wouldn’t like having their omega doing such a dangerous job, but that was because they weren’t very good alphas. If they couldn’t keep their omega safe while they lived their life, then they should just say that instead of putting the responsibility on their omega.
But I also knew Lucy didn’t understand just how far either of us would go for her, and we needed to find a way to prove that or she’d leave us because she was too terrified to rely on us.
She couldn’t risk trusting us after what had happened with her father.
Now that I knew why he’d done it, it was hard to be mad. I understood exactly why her father had killed those alphas and I couldn’t fault him for that, but I could still blame him for putting Lucy through so much grief and trauma.
He should have done a better job of covering up his tracks. Maybe then Lucy wouldn’t think she needed to isolate herself like this.
The sounds of her pleasure settled some of the rage I felt at the idea of her leaving us, but it wasn’t enough. I needed her reassurance – with words or bodies, I didn’t care. I just needed to know she wouldn’t disappear the second we were asleep.
From now on, neither of us could sleep at the same time. Not until she was bonded to at least one of us.
This psychosis Lucy had would take more than a week to ease, and I couldn’t go longer than that without losing my mind. I’d tried it once, just to see – before Cas’s rut synced with mine, I’d needed to see if I could stay awake during his cycle to make sure nothing happened that he couldn’t manage alone.
Once again, I felt overwhelming gratitude that Cas had chosen to tie his life to mine. If it was just me and Lucy, I wouldn’t be able to do what needed to be done. I may be a legacy alpha, but even I could only go so long without sleep.
Getting Lucy to stay with us wasn’t going to be easy, and despite our past connection, I knew I couldn’t do this alone. It fucking rankled my pride to admit it, but all this was my fault. If I’d just stayed, she never would have stopped relying on me.
I would have been there every step of the way, and now…
Now, I’d just have to make up for it.
The sound of the water splashing in the bathtub told me she was close to an orgasm, but her stubborn streak was showing. Otherwise, she never would have lasted this long. Lucy didn’t want to give Cas the satisfaction of coming as quickly as she would have if he hadn’t riled her up like that.
I grinned and leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees as I listened to him ask how long she planned to be a little brat and deny him her orgasm. I wanted to tell him she’d always be like this, but it would be more fun to let him figure it out for himself.
Sliding my gaze to the nightstand, I considered how I wanted to let this play out.
The timing had to be perfect. I couldn’t let Cas knot her again so soon or I might just stab him, but he needed this moment – he needed to see what she looked like when all her attention was on him and no one else.
Then he would understand why I was so fucking obsessed.
If he didn’t already.
Once she came for him, I’d let him get right to the edge. The moment he fell over…
My grin widened and I reached over to tug open the drawer of my nightstand. Inside were two things I planned to give Lucy, and neither of them were an engagement ring. I wouldn’t hide something like that in such an obvious place, and that was something I wanted her to choose.
I grabbed the stash of emergency contraceptive candy and popped one in my mouth, biting into the hard candy and crushing it to nothing but dust. I chewed what was left and grabbed one more.
These handy-dandy little things were brand new, courtesy of some scientist Nathan had asked me to sponsor. They worked on alphas, betas, and omegas. As long as the omega ate one within seven days of the first time they had unprotected sex, they wouldn’t get pregnant even with an alpha knotting them.
That omega scientist was just as damaged as Lucy, if for different reasons, but it had made her fucking brilliant.
Eating one before I came inside her would make sure I couldn’t impregnate her for at least a week. It killed me to do it, but I refused to give her another reason to run away. If she didn’t want us to breed her, then we wouldn’t. I’d just make sure we got a lot of practice in for when she was finally ready.
If ever.
It was fine. We didn’t need kids. We only needed Lucy, but I wasn’t going to lie to myself and say I wouldn’t be disappointed. It just wasn’t worth losing her over and never would be. There were enough kids in the pack to satisfy our alpha needs. Giving all the Valor children a safe place to grow and thrive would be more than enough.
But I wasn’t going to let her think I didn’t want that from her. No, she would be treated as the most precious omega to ever exist…who just so happened to like working in a dangerous field.
The small sashimi knife tucked next to the candy was so sharp she wouldn’t even feel it slice through her skin until it started to sting. It was my favorite knife and I was curious what Lucy would think of it.
