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“Hey,” I answer, guilt spilling through my words. “I shouldn’t have said it like that. Last night was amazing. Should you be calling? Don’t you have team stuff?”
“Break. Was just signing swag before we watch tape, but I’m done.” It sounds like he’s walking, the echoes in the background drifting in and out. “What do you regret? Because I’ve got my own list. Wondering how much overlaps.”
He makes it so easy to be honest.
“I regret fighting this thing between us. Pretending that first night was enough… that it was all I wanted.”
The background noise dies away completely, and I hear Ben sigh.
“I get that. Last night felt so easy. Hard not to ask why we made it so difficult.”
“Exactly.” God, why couldn’t we have just trusted in that connection?
But I already know the answer. It’s history. A few weeks nearly a decade ago… with an aftermath that lasted years. At least, for me.
“But what we’ve got to remember is that we took our time because we cared. Because we didn’t want to let some rash decision— even if it turned out to be the right one —risk something we cared about.”
I swallow past the knot of emotion in my throat. “Kind of wishing you were here right now.”
He huffs a low laugh. “Probably better I’m not. If I had you within touching distance, pretty sure Big Ben would be in the driver’s seat. All these mature insights would be stuck in the backseat while I made you come on my tongue a few times.”
“Ben!” I cough out with a laugh.
“Come on, we’ve met, right?” I swear I can hear that sexy smile.
We talk a little longer. He wants to make sure I’m still good with the dog-walking service he hired having access to the apartment when we aren’t home, and one of the walkers stopping in later this morning to meet me and give Zamboni his first walk.
I am, though I’ll ask him tonight if he minds tweaking the schedule so we don’t need the service when I’m home. It’s nice he didn’t presume I’d want to help, but… I do.
A few hours later, the dog walker shows up. He’s on time, packing a pocket full of healthy treats and a business card with instructions on how to use the app to track their activity. It’s pretty cool.
Me: Walker and Z just left if you want to check the app to make sure it’s working.
Ben: Already did.
Ben: Have another app I like playing with though.
Ben: Get your toy.
20
Ben
Lara comes to the game and sits with my mom in my seats. She’s been to other games. Sat in Bowie’s seats with Piper once and with Misty in Noel’s once. But tonight, she’s in mine.
My focus is on the ice. The play. The game.
But those handful of times when there’s a break and I catch her chatting with my mom, laughing, while her eyes follow me…
Yeah.
A guy could get used to that.
Like he could get used to coming home from the road and finding his gorgeous girl, snuggled up with his dog on the couch, just waiting to welcome him back.
For years, I never wanted it. Didn’t miss it.
But now that Lara’s in my life again… It’s fucking nice.
