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You'd think I'd see it as some noble sacrifice, some act of heroism, but I couldn't muster an ounce of admiration. There was nothing noble about it, nothing heroic. If so much as asingle goddamn hair on her head was harmed, I swear I'd have crumbled into oblivion. She is my everything—my pulse, my soul, the very essence of my existence.
And yet, she doubted that. She doubted that I'd be utterly lost without her. Darkness surged within me, a tempest threatening to consume everything in its wake. How dare she entertain the thought that I could carry on living with her gone?
Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed her shifting uncomfortably in her seat, her fingers fidgeting together anxiously. She took a deep breath, as if steeling herself, before finally uttering, "I'm sorry."
That was the moment I snapped. I couldn't hold back any longer. "You should be," I spat out, my voice dripping with bitterness.
She rushed over her words, "I know I've dragged nothing but trouble into your life. There are countless things I need to apologize for, and—"
If I thought I was furious before, it was nothing compared to the rage that consumed me at her words. A dark, humorless laugh escaped me. "Luna, you're apologizing for being in my life right now, when I'm furious at you for even considering I could exist without you in it. Do you have any idea how deeply I feel for you?" My anger crackled in the air, filling the car with its electric intensity.
. Her furrowed brows and twisted lips betrayed her struggle to comprehend my anger, my frustration. This woman, so delicate yet so reckless, threatened to unravel me completely.
With a sharp turn of the wheel, I veered off the road, parking the car. These streets were empty anyway, not a car in sight since we set off. I turned to face her, my gaze piercing, unyielding.
"What the hell were you thinking, standing in front of that gun?" The words clawed their way out of my throat, sounding more of an animalistic hiss than human.
She flinched at the intensity of my tone, her eyes wide with fear. "I... I couldn't bear to see you hurt," she murmured.
Her admission only licked at the flames in my chest. "Hurt?" I scoffed. "You think I am not hurt right now? You think I can live with that image haunting me for the rest of my life?"
My fists clenched at my pant suit as I continued, my breaths ragged “You've condemned me to a lifetime of nightmares, Luna. Every time I close my eyes, I see you with that damned gun against your head and I just about lose my fucking mind.”
She wouldn't back down. "Do you think you're the only one in love?" she shot back with defiance. "I would do anything to protect you, Adrik.”
In a fit of agitation, I struck the seat beside me, digging my fingers into the leather so hard that it ripped. "You're not my protector, Luna. You are my obsession, my addiction, my reason for living," I declared.
"Leave the worry of protecting us for me," I insisted, my words carrying a weight of command. "It shouldn't be something you worry about. I protect us."
"And don't ever think to sacrifice yourself for me," I warned, my voice cracking with emotion. “"If something were to happen to you... I wouldn't survive. I'd follow right after you.”
As my words lingered, I sensed her resistance wane, her posture softening ever so slightly. Her shoulders relaxed, and the tension in her jaw eased as she processed the intensity of my confession. There was a flicker of understanding in her eyes, mingled with a hint of fear.
Turning away from her, I shifted the car into drive and headed back toward the cabin. With every passing mile, I couldn't shake the feeling of her precariousness, of the danger she willingly faced for me.
Glancing at her, I noticed her head against the window, lost in her own thoughts. The dim moonlight cast shadows across her face, accentuating the delicate curve of her cheek. In that moment, she looked fragile, a stark contrast to her earlier determination.
Dark thoughts consumed me as I grappled with the realization of just how close I had come to losing her. The idea of her life hanging in the balance, of the possibility of her being torn from me, sent a chill down my spine. I found myself obsessively checking on her, my eyes darting to her every few seconds to ensure she was still there, still safe.
As we reached the cabin, I wasted no time. Without a word, I pulled up to the cabin's entrance and put the car in park. Opening the car door for Luna, I scooped her up in my arms, carrying her inside with care.
Laying her down gently on the bed, I watched as she rested her head on my chest, her eyes heavy with exhaustion. I couldn't help but notice the way she analyzed me, as if searching for something hidden beneath the surface. I knew I was being colder than usual, but I couldn't help it. My chest felt hollow, like a vice was squeezing the life out of me.
Before heading to the bathroom, I grabbed a glass of water and a bottle of painkillers from the kitchen, knowing she'd need them. Back in the bedroom, I handed them to her, ensuring she had what she needed before I left.
"I'm taking a shower," I muttered softly, already beginning to strip off my clothes before disappearing into the bathroom. Iturned the water on, adjusting the temperature until it was scalding hot. Stepping under the jets, I let the water cascade over me, hoping it would warm me up. But as the steam filled the air and the water beat down on my skin, I realized that no amount of heat could chase away the coldness that had taken root inside me. No matter how hot I made it, the coldness in my bones refused to dissipate.
The bathroom door creaked open, and the soft sound of her footsteps echoed against the tiled floor. I could feel her presence before I saw her, the air thick with anticipation. The rustle of fabric hinted at her intentions, and I braced myself for her approach.
As she stepped under the scalding hot water, her sharp intake of breath assaulted my senses. The heat was unbearable, but I welcomed it, relishing in the pain as it seared through my skin. But then, she reached down and adjusted the temperature, and a part of me wanted to protest. I wanted to beg her to leave it, to let the water scald me raw, to match the fire burning inside me.
But she didn't listen to my silent pleas. Instead, she closed the distance between us, her naked body pressing against mine. Her arms wrapped around me, holding me in a tight embrace that threatened to suffocate me. And then her lips, soft and warm, began to pepper kisses all over my skin, leaving trails of heat in their wake.
It was in those moments, with her lips on mine and her body pressed against mine, that I began to thaw. The coldness that had gripped me from the inside out started to recede, replaced by the warmth of her touch, the heat of her kisses. She was here, with me, alive and whole, and for that brief moment, everything else faded away.
"Adrik, look at me, look into my eyes," she demanded. I could sense the desperation in her tone, but I couldn't bring myself to meet her gaze. What if was just an illusion, a cruel trick of my fractured mind? What if I looked, she would vanish into thin air, leaving me alone in the darkness?
I pushed her away, creating a small distance between us in a feeble attempt to shield myself and her from whatever the fuck was happening to me. Her reaction was immediate, her hands reaching out to grasp my face. "Please, my love, look at me," she pleaded, her voice barely a whisper against the backdrop of my chaotic thoughts. I could feel the urgency in her words, and it only served to tighten the knot of dread that had taken root in the pit of my stomach.
