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“It looks like insurance didn’t cover this,” she says.
I shake my head. “They should have. It’s one of her monthly refills.”
She looks at her computer again, types something, then glances my way. “I’m sorry. It shows they denied the claim.”
My mind races. “How much is it out of pocket?”
“It’s one-thousand-two-hundred and fifty dollars.”
“What?” I choke out. “No. They have to cover it. We can’t pay that every month. Can you resubmit it?”
When she looks at me like she’s about to tell me no, I slump my shoulders. “Please. Can you try?”
She sighs and nods. “Give me a few minutes.”
By the time she calls me back up to the window, my nerves are shot, and I’m so frazzled, I can’t think straight.
“They covered it. I’m not sure why it was denied the first time,” she says as she drops the bottle into a paper bag and hands it to me.
I blink several times, then slowly nod before I back away. “Thanks.”
I spend the next few minutes in the meat section, trying to figure out what to make for dinner. I’m struggling to make a decision. I want to call Dane and ask him, but with as much time as he’s taken off recently because of the wedding and my mom and going up to Seattle, I don’t want to bug him with something so simple.
Finally, I give up and leave the store with no groceries. We have cans of soup at home for all I care. I’m not hungry anyway. All I want to do is curl up in bed.
Because I had to stay up so late with my mom last night, Dane didn’t get me ready for bed like he has every other night since we moved in. I missed it and slept terribly even once I dozed off. I didn’t say anything this morning about it. I don’t want him to feel bad, but I think it’s affecting my mood today.
The nurse leaves shortly after I arrive home. My mom is in her recliner, yanking at her yarn. When I greet her, all she does is glance up for a brief second before she continues what she was doing.
The boxes sitting in the corner of the living room only make me feel more defeated. I scrub a hand along my brow and trudge over to them. Might as well get started.
I open the first one and sigh. I need to get this done, but I don’t want to. I don’t want to do anything. I want to cry. Or scream.
Guilt bubbles up inside my tummy. What’s wrong with me that I have this great life and I feel so icky? I have the man I’ve always loved, I’m back home with my friends and my mom. I should be glowing with happiness. And I am happy. I’m just overwhelmed.
“Hey, baby.”
Dane’s voice startles me. I didn’t hear him come in. “Oh, hey.”
He moves close to me and leans down to give me a kiss but pauses midway. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I’m fine.”
“You don’t look like you’re fine.”
I shrug and turn to look at the open box. “I went to the store to get groceries for dinner, but I couldn’t figure out what to get so I didn’t get anything.”
“Okay. We’ll order pizza tonight. I’ll go grocery shopping tomorrow. No big deal, baby.”
Shaking my head, I huff. “It is a big deal. I can’t seem to get anything right. I can’t even figure out what to make for dinner.”
Dane grabs my hand. “Come with me.”
He glances at my mom as he pulls me toward the stairs. When we go down the hall, I expect him to turn into our bedroom, but instead, he opens my playroom. He leads me inside and closes the door behind us.
“Look at me,” he says firmly.
As soon as I meet his gaze, my lip trembles.
