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26
ZOE
I don’t know how I’m going to be able to fall asleep at night without Christian.
In the two weeks that have passed since I’ve shot Demarco, I haven’t slept on my own often.
If I try to nap in the middle of the day while Christian is working, I wake up screaming. All I can see when I close my eyes is the man I shot in the head.
Even though I know he would have killed us, the guilt is still eating me alive.
The dead look in his eyes keeps haunting me.
But if I had to do it again, I would.
Sleeping in Christian’s arms at night is the only thing that keeps the nightmares away. With him, I know that I’m safe. He isn’t going to let anything happen to me.
But now that he’s going away, I’m going to have to try to sleep on my own. Demarco’s face is going to star in my nightmares every night.
I already know that I’m going to be counting down the days until Christian comes home.
It’s going to be a long couple of nights.
I sit on the edge of the bed, watching as he packs his bag for the next few days. Christian smiles at me, tugging on a strand of my hair.
“Stop looking so sad,” he says as he turns back to the dresser and pulls out a couple of his faded band tees. “Everything is going to be fine, and I’ll be back before you know it.”
“If I keep looking sad, is it going to stop you from leaving?” I pull my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around them. “I know everything is going to be fine. I’m just going to miss you. I wish that there was some way I could have changed the performance schedule around so I could be there with you.”
Now that Demarco is dead, Christian’s been allowing a third night of performances a week.
He’s been there for every single show over the last two weeks, sitting near the stage and cheering the loudest.
I’ve got two performances while he’s gone, and Ruben is going to be escorting me to both of them. Camila and Ava are going to be there as well, along with the entire security team that follows me around.
It feels good to know that he is confident enough to let me go without him now, but I still wish that he was going to be there.
Christian smiles and drops a kiss to my forehead. “We talked about the performances, Zoe. You love performing. You’re not going to miss doing what you love to come sit around and wait for me every day. Especially not when there are going to be agents at those performances.”
“What?” My mouth drops open as I stare at him. “What do you mean? I didn’t hear anything about agents being there.”
Christian shrugs and packs the last shirt into his bag before zipping it up. “Joe told me the other day after one of your shows. He was talking to some of his industry friends and invited a few of them.”
My heart races, and my pulse pounds in my ears.
I grin and squeal, leaping up from the bed to hug Christian.
He laughs as he catches me and spins me around.
His mouth finds mine, our lips moving together softly as he sets me down on the ground.
“There will be no rearranging your performance schedule when this is your big chance,” Christian’s voice is soft as he smiles down at me. “You’re going to go and play your songs and sing your heart out, and I’m sure that one of those agents is going to sign you.”
“How do you know that?” My stomach twists and turns as all the ways that this could go wrong circle through my mind.
I could lose my voice in the middle of a song. I could forget how to play one of my songs. I may forget the words. The agents might not like me. They might leave the bars and tell their record labels that I’m not good enough to work with them.
“Zoe, you are the most talented person that I’ve ever met. The shows are going to go great and I’m going to call you after each one and ask you how they went. Then you’re going to tell me that the agents loved you, and they’re fighting over you for their record labels.”
