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The plane lifts off, ever higher, the people on the ground growing tiny.
As my eyes stay glued to the window, the rest of the world fades away.
I really should have stayed in Colombia.
“Cheer up, big brother.” Camila gets out of the waiting car with her arms open to the sides. “You should be excited to be back home and see your sister."
I hug her and shake my head. “You didn’t have to come pick me up from the airport."
"Of course, I did. I’ve been waiting to talk to you about this marriage plan you have.”
I sigh. "Not up for discussion. It needs to happen.”
Guilt courses through me at the way her gaze drifts around the tarmac.
When Ruben, Camila, and I had the meeting to discuss the marriage, she opposed it. But by then, it was no longer a matter of if it would happen. It was a matter of when.
This is my life. My choice.
I'll never marry for love. Never thought I'd be married at all. And if this marriage wasn't happening now, I'd be single forever.
Better than falling in love and having the person ripped away from you.
The pain of losing a loved one is the worst kind of pain. And I never want to be the reason someone else loses their life. Because associating with me is dangerous.
Loving me is deadly.
Love is supposed to be a good thing. But I know better.
This life doesn't lend itself to love. Not where I'm concerned.
One day, Camila is going to take over the cartel. It’s not what I'd want for her, but it's what she wants for her life, and if I’m being honest, I’m looking forward to a break.
However, that’s not going to happen until she’s ready.
Right now, she is working her way through medical school. How she is going to run the cartel and act as their doctor, I have no idea, but if anyone can make it work, it's her.
But right now, she doesn’t need to try and figure out how to help the cartel when this marriage can do just that.
Her focus should be on school so her life can be more than just killing people.
I wish my life was more than just killing people.
Camila shrugs and pulls her dark hair over one shoulder, combing her fingers through it. “I know. I don’t like it, though. You should be marrying a woman you love. Not one who gives you an advantage. I hate you being lonely, but I'm not so sure this is the right move for you.”
“I’m not lonely.”
"Right." She rolls her eyes. She has the uncanny ability of seeing right through me.
I grin. “I promise you I’m not. You know as well as I do that running the cartel takes up a lot of time. If we add the legitimate businesses I have, it leaves me no time to even think about relationships, let alone a serious one.”
“That’s bullshit, and we both know it. You had to go to another state to spend time with your friends. Sure, you may be working with Jovan and Alessio in an alliance, but they’re your friends. Hadley and Billie are great too, so don’t feed me that bullshit about being too busy to maintain relationships.”
“Look at you, thinking that you know everything.”
She laughs, turning to head to the car that is waiting on the tarmac to take us home. “You’re right. I do know everything. Billie told me that she’s your best friend, and you talk about girls together.”
I groan and run a hand down my face. “I talked to her once! About one situation!”
