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“Well, he was blowing me up like crazy, telling me how worried you were about me—this was before he called the PI, I guess? Maybe after? I have no idea. Anyway, I went to his office to meet with him. I needed money for more drugs, and I figured I’d go and tell him I was checking in to ease your conscience, and maybe he’d give me some money.”
“You have met Spencer, right?”
He laughed. “Yes, but I thought I could manipulate his feelings for you, trying to be a savior and all that.”
“And he sent you to rehab?”
“Not at first. I think he sensed I wouldn’t go,” he answered. “It was the second time I met with him and Jim that things started to click on their own, and I took the help he offered to pay for. I was in a pretty bad place then, and I knew I would end up dead if I didn’t take what the angels were offering me through Spencer.”
“And?” I was feeling my heart open.
“And like a big brother would, he helped me.” Shane’s eyes filled with tears, “He went to every meeting he was allowed to attend and supported me in every sense of the word. He never mentioned you or that he was doing this for you. It helped me to know he had my best interest at heart and cared about what happened to me; he wasn’t just using me to get somewhere with you or anything.”
I sighed. “Well, isn’t he a real hero, then?” I smiled, feeling warmth ignite where my heart had grown cold for Spencer Monroe. “He jerked your handsome butt out of the flames and exposed our father, and—”
I felt my cheeks flush when I hung onto that last word, not knowing whether I should tell my brother about the pregnancy.
“And, what?” he said curiously.
“Well, he’s the reason I’m going to be a mother in eight months and you an uncle.”
Shane’s jaw dropped, and his bright eyes grew as wide as silver dollars. “No. Oh, my God,” he said sweetly, hugging me so tight that all I could do was squeal.
For the first time since everything exploded, I felt good. I really felt great, like everything was going to be okay. I was going to be okay. Thank God for this feeling because I believed I deserved it by now. And for the first time, I could celebrate this child growing in my belly. I was happy and thankful instead of disturbed, put out, and annoyed.
I felt that tiny flame for Spencer I’d tried so hard to extinguish grow bigger, knowing what he did for my brother and not expecting anything in return. Like everyone kept insisting, Spencer was a good man. It just took me some time, a few miracles, and my dad being flushed into the sewer to notice it.
And for the first time since everything fell apart, I knew in my bones that I loved him. There was no doubt in my mind. He was genuine and authentic and most definitely a bonehead for hiring a PI without my knowledge, but now, I knew he meant well.
“Is Spencer here with you?” I questioned, feeling ready to see him and at least thank him for everything he’d done.
And, of course, tell him I was carrying his child.
“No,” Shane answered. “I’m only out of the center on a day pass. I have a few more months before I’ll be out on my own again.”
“Oh,” I said in confusion. “So, does Spencer know you’re here?”
“I have no idea?” he shrugged. “He came to the center yesterday to inform me about dad, and that’s the last I talked to him. I did ask him if you knew, and he confirmed that you did. When he told me you were with Bree, I arranged to visit you for the day.”
“I have to talk to Spencer,” I said, feeling more urgency in that than ever.
I threw back the covers, turned around, and hugged Shane again. “I love you, and I’m so happy you’re here, but I have to see Spencer.”
He grinned, “I have to get back anyway. I’m glad I could bring you back together.”
“Oh,” I said, turning back before entering the bathroom to shower, “we’re not back together. I just have to see him.”
Shane laughed. “You’re such a drama queen. Does he know about the baby?”
“No,” I said with a laugh. “That’s why I can safely say we’re not back together. I’ll probably scare the shit out of him and send his ass running to hide in the Swiss Alps.”
“No kidding,” Shane said. “Well, good luck, and I love you.”
“I love you more, honey. We’ve got this,” I said with profound determination. “All of us. And we’re all going to be okay.”
Chapter Forty-Four
NAT
