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“Do I get to turn back into an animal after that?”
He licked his lips and smiled at me. “Fuck yes.”
“So I’ll get to mark you where anyone can see, stake my claim, make sure Miles won’t have any questions about who you belong to?”
He rolled his eyes. “Miles doesn’t think he owns me. He’s my friend. He hired me because I needed a purpose.”
“I think he sees all three of you as his.”
Carter hesitated for a moment. “Maybe.” He was silent for a moment, and I started to worry. “Matteo, I want to be with you, but I can’t be….”
“Owned by me except when we’re fucking?”
He let out a shaky breath. “Yes.”
“I’ll give you a little while to get used to it, but you are mine, and I’m not running away again.”
“Not even to save me?”
His words cut through me, making me shiver. “I’ll do anything I have to do to save you, but I won’t let you think….”
He pulled me into his arms and held me tight. “I know. I’m not going to run either.”
Somehow, I managed to help Carter wash the dirt and debris from his body and clean up all his scratches without shoving him against the wall of the shower and fucking him again. It wasn’t easy, but he’d asked for some time to be civilized. I could give him that, even though the thought of the two of us just sitting down, eating dinner, and talking made me worry. Could that work? We hadn’t had much chance for that back in the jungle, but there had been some moments—like after our first time together—and those had been damn good.
Even if the thought of trying to sit and talk scared me, I wasn’t about to say no. I wouldn’t do anything to push Carter away, not when I actually had a chance with him. He wanted to spend time with me, and I wanted that too. I wished I could be sure I still knew how to have a civilized conversation. I’d been in deep cover with the cartel for less than a year, but it felt like forever, and manners and civility hadn’t been important.
For those months, it felt like nothing existed outside of that world except my memories of Carter. They’d gotten me through the worst of it, but I wasn’t quite ready to accept that I could have the thing I’d been dreaming of.
I leaned down and kissed Carter’s shoulder, lapping up some drops of water he hadn’t gotten with the towel. He sucked in his breath, and I wanted to push him down onto the bed and take him again and again. I wanted to see how many times I could make him come before we had to leave this place, go into the city, and face his friends, but I resisted the pull of him and took a step back. “I’ll make us something to eat while you get dressed.”
He raised his brows. “You can cook?”
“I can heat up one of the frozen pizzas I saw in the freezer.”
He snorted. “I bet you can open up a few beers as well.”
“I can, baby,” I purred. “Let me take care of you.”
Carter rolled his eyes, and I hurried to the kitchen before I gave in to what I really wanted from him. I’d just fucked him mercilessly not an hour ago, but I was hard as hell again. Would I ever get enough?
No, I didn’t think I would, not even if we lived past one hundred.
Carter came in as I was sticking the pizza in the oven. I handed him a beer, and he sat down at the small table in the kitchen. I leaned against the counter and let myself take him in. I was actually here, in his cabin, and I was going to stay here. I was going to sleep in his bed. I’d dreamed about a night like this for so long.
“Are you okay?” Carter asked.
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I mean, yes, in most ways I’m more okay than I ever thought I would be. I’m here with you and you’re…tolerating me.”
“I think I did a little more than tolerate you out there.” He tilted his head toward the woods.
“Maybe. Although you tolerated me like that before everything fell apart.”
“You knew back then that it was way more than tolerating you. I was obsessed with you.”
“Maybe, but it’s damn good to hear you say it.”
“Tell me what you were thinking about just now,” he said.
