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“And even better now.” She turns in my arms and kisses me. I forget all about Mars and million-dollar lenses and ten years’ worth of work in an instant.
It’s all desire, longing, hunger. When we break the kiss, PJ inhales a shaky breath that matches mine.
“I’ve missed you, Junebug.”
“Ah, me too. But we’re being silly. It’s only been a couple weeks.”
“A long fucking couple weeks.” My voice is a low growl against her ear, and she sighs. I nip at her ear and trail kissesdown her neck. I feel her go limp against me as she tips her head back to give me better access to the soft, sweet-smelling skin at the base of her throat. Kissing her there too, I’m ready to shove millions of dollars’ worth of telescopes aside and take her right here in the middle of the lab.
But she’s here all weekend, and I need to slow my roll.
“Okay, tell me what I’m looking at.” PJ positions herself like a quarterback getting ready for the snap and looks through the lens.
I know the landscape of Mars by heart since I’ve been staring at it for months. Even though she can’t see me, I point at the sky and narrate the path the telescope will follow, based on how I’ve programmed it.
“This is where we’ve been exploring for the past year. You can see the rover moving through the dust. It’s gathering images, but I’m mainly using it to map the terrain for future spacecraft to land.”
“That is so cool. Does it move all the time, or are you controlling it?”
“It’s programmed to move all the time, but I can tell it to change course or focus on specific things.”
“Wow. It’s…spectacular.”
PJ’s wavy blond hair catches the moonlight beaming through the open hatch of the observatory. In her loose-fitting dress, PJ casts attention away from the curves of her spectacular body, which is just fine with me. I don’t need any other man ogling her.
I wrap a hand around her hip and pull her against me. I flick a lever on the scope to move it upward, knowing exactly what PJ will see. Her gasp tracks with the vast display of stars that will never fail to blow my mind when I see them.
“The Milky Way. Have you seen it before through a telescope?”
“No, just on camping trips when I was a kid. And it was kind of hard to see, if I’m honest.”
I nod against the crown of her head, lost in thought. “A week from now, we’ll be airborne.” I’ve said it to myself so many times it feels like a mantra.
“Are you nervous?” She pulls away from the telescope to look at me. “Probably not, right? For you, flying a mission is like delivering a pizza.”
Her faulty assumption has me stuttering. “N-not at all. Are you kidding? I’ve been on pins and needles for weeks.”
“You don’t show it.”
She turns to kiss me, and the nerves disappear. All I feel is her enveloping me in her scent and soft curves.
“I should go,” she murmurs against my neck. It’s not what I’m expecting her to say, but she looks up at me and nods. “You’re launching in a week. I know you invited me for the weekend, but you need to focus without me distracting you. And I want to distract you.”
“I want that too.”
“I don’t want to take you away from the things that bring you joy.”
“You are one of those things.”
She smiles. “I’m gonna go. We’re good. Do what you need to do at work.” I know she’s doing what she thinks is best for me, but all she’s doing is driving home the reality that I can’t balance work and a relationship. This—seeing her for a couple hours every few weeks—is not balance.
And yet, I know she’s right. I do need to focus on the launch. I see our future dissolving before my eyes, even though she’s right here reassuring me we’re still good.
It doesn’t feel good.
“Okay…yeah.”
The fact that she understands me so well scares me a little bit. I’m completely off kilter when it comes to her, and yeah, it scares the fuck out of me.
