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“I know, querido. I understand.”
“You do?”
I cupped his cheek. “You found love. That matters far more than anything else. If I were in your shoes, I’d make the same choice.”
“Thank you.” Tiago’s voice was thick with emotion. “And you know I’ll always be here for you, right? You’ll never lose me.”
Tears pricked at the corners of my eyes again. “I know. Eu te amo.”
“I love you too. Nothing will ever change that.”
This wasn’t the end. It was the beginning of something new.
A few hours later, the door clicked shut behind me as I stepped into my new house. Everything had been moved in, and I had waved good-bye to Tiago and Cas, who’d helped me bring over the last boxes. This was it. A new start.
Alone.
I meandered through the house, which felt so foreign to me. The dark blue leather couch fit well with the light gray walls and the white coffee table, and a rug with an abstract pattern in blue and gray brought everything together. I’d left the kitchen as it was, since it had been a practical white. Cas had painted the walls there too so it looked clean and fresh.
My bedroom was a mess. I still had to unpack the boxes and suitcases with my clothes and make the bed, but that shouldn’t take too much time. The connecting bathroom was small, but the walk-in shower was nice, and I didn’t need a bathtub anyway.
The spare bedroom was a little cramped with my desk in it. No idea what I’d need it for, but what else was I going to do with that space? The finished space in the basement was perfect to put some gym equipment in, and another extra bedroom could function as a guest bedroom—if I ever got guests. Maybe Marnin would want to make use of the guest room? Nah, he’d opt for Tiago’s. My brother’s house was much nicer and bigger…and he and Tiago had been much closer than I had realized.
I thought Tiago had always confided fully in me, but he’d never told me about hooking up with Marnin over the years. I’d only found out about that last year around the reunion, and I wasn’t sure how to feel about that. One of the many items on a long list of things I had questions about. At this point, what did I actually know for a fact? Not much.
My heart ached with an unfamiliar loneliness, and I struggled to breathe. The walls seemed to close in on me, and I felt like I was suffocating under the weight of my thoughts. Jesus Cristo, I was feeling way too sorry for myself, and I needed to stop it. Right now.
Before I realized it, I had my phone in my hands. Only it wasn’t Tiago I was calling, but Fir.
“Everything okay?” he said.
Somehow hearing his voice brought tears to my eyes all over again. I was fucking losing it. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. I just…I just wanted to tell you I’m in my new house.”
“Congratulations! How does it feel?”
Terrifying. “I’m excited about this new step.”
He chuckled softly. “You’re a horrible liar, Tomás Banner.”
“I’m trying to be excited about this new step.”
“Did you contact any of the therapists?”
He’d sent me a list of six therapists, three in the area and three who did virtual sessions. “I haven’t had time yet, what with moving and everything.”
“Tomás…”
“I will. I’ll call them tomorrow, I promise.”
He was quiet for a few beats. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m fine. Just feeling a bit sorry for myself.”
“Do you want me to stop by?” Someone talked in the background. “One sec, Tomás.”
His voice came muffled through the phone. “Gimme two minutes, Gabe, and then we’ll look at your paper, okay?”
His kids. Fir had kids. I was selfish, claiming his time when his sons needed him. “No need to stop by,” I said as soon as he was back. “Go spend time with your boys.”
